- CHAPTER TWO -

The Birthday

 

The following afternoon, Derek Crumble sat with a puzzled look on his face as his wife drove him and his family back from the planetarium. Why they had gone there in the first place escaped him. Lizzie had said she'd wanted to see the stars. That normally meant some awful boy band - not the things that twinkled at night. And Billy had insisted on coming as well! He'd left his room without a whimper and had started mumbling something about research, before being shut up by a glare from his sister.

He glanced over his shoulder at them and grunted. Lizzie was sprawled over most of the back seat with her arm out the window while Billy sat beside her, rigid with fear, wearing his earphones to cut out the noise and some large sunglasses to cut out the light.

Suddenly a car horn hooted, and Billy let out a  terrified yelp.

Derek sighed. "Pull your arm in Lizzie."

"It's my bloody arm," said Lizzie.

"It will be very bloody indeed if it gets ripped off!" said her father.

He peered out of the windscreen. "What's up with this traffic? I was hoping to do the old peoples' home next door. I must say I've worked wonders keeping those roses alive in this heat-wave."

"Don't you think of anything else apart from gardening?" asked Lizzie.

"That's what pays the bills," said her father. "Anyway, at least plants appreciate when you do things for them. They blossom and bloom into something pretty." 

"Well I'm not a blooming plant am I?" said Lizzie. "Anyway there are too many weeds choking me." 

A car horn shrieked past and Billy began to cry.

Caroline reached back, patted her son's knee and shouted at the top of her voice:

"Don't worry Billy! We're nearly home! We'll soon have you tucked up nice and safe in your room!"

She pressed a button, closing the windows, just as more car horns started honking. Then she noticed something odd. All the traffic seemed to be speeding by in the opposite direction, and there were lots of people rushing past on the pavement. She turned into their road, slammed on the brakes and the car screeched to a halt barely missing a huge tank that was blocking the road! 

Billy started wailing and Derek started shouting, and suddenly Mrs Piggott, from the old peoples' home appeared. She was wearing a party hat, and had a birthday cake on her lap, and she was sitting in a chair being carried along by four soldiers who were running as if their lives depended on it! More chairs with old people appeared making it look like some weird geriatric race; and most of the old people had the same idea. Some were even clapping their hands, shouting: "Faster! Faster!"

"This is all your fault!" screamed Mrs Piggott, as she caught sight of Lizzie. "You've ruined my party! I'll get you for this!"

"What does she mean you've ruined her party?" asked her father.

"I've no idea," started Lizzie.

"I knew you were up to something! What on earth have you done this time?"

"Derek," said his wife.

"Not now love. I've just about had enough of her!"

"Derek!" Repeated his wife.

She placed a hand on his shoulder and pointed at the giant banner dangling from a huge flying saucer that was hovering over their house.

Derek looked up and rubbed his eyes. It didn't say "Greetings Earthlings! We come in peace." It didn't even say: "We will destroy the Earth in ten minutes!" What it actually said was something much worse! It said: "Happy Birthday Ambassador Lizzie Crumble!"

 

 

- CHAPTER THREE -

The Big Umbrella

 

Colonel Brown stepped out of his tent and marched stiffly in the direction of the shouting and screaming. 

"What are these civilians doing here?" he said, his small moustache bristling with annoyance.

"Colonel Brown!" exclaimed a soldier who'd been arguing with Derek Crumble. "They won't leave. And they're causing a disturbance."

"We're causing a disturbance?" roared Derek Crumble. "We're not the ones with the tanks and trucks and big army boots!"

He pointed to some soldiers digging a trench in the garden of the old people's home.

"I've been looking after that lawn for six years!" he hollered. "Look at it! Look what you've done to it!"

"Excuse me!" bellowed Colonel Brown, "I'm sorry for messing up the grass, but you may have noticed there's a flying saucer hovering over that house!"     

"There's no need to take that attitude!" said Caroline Crumble. "Of course we can see it! It is rather large!"

"Then you'll understand why I would like you to move away!"

"We can't move away," said Caroline. "We live there."

"Number twenty three. That's us you idiot!" growled her husband.

The colonel turned to Lizzie. "In that case, I don't suppose your name is..."

Suddenly four police motorbikes turned into the road, followed by two large black cars with two small flags flapping excitedly on their fronts. The flags on the first car were 'Union Jacks', and on and the second car fluttered the American 'Stars and stripes'. The cars screeched to a halt and lots of men with black suits and dark sunglasses got out and looked around. Then one of the men spoke into his jacket collar, the passenger doors of the cars opened, and the Crumble family found themselves face to face with the Queen, the Prime Minister, and the American President!   

"Your Majesty!" gasped Colonel Brown. "Prime Minister! Mr President! I'm not sure it's safe to be here."

"Nonsense!" said the President, pointing at the flying saucer. "This thing flew right over Buckingham Palace while we were having lunch. It could have taken us out right there and then."

The Queen beckoned to the Prime Minister, a confused look on her face. "Taken us out?"

"Destroyed us your Majesty," explained the Prime Minister.

The Queen nodded in understanding then she noticed the Crumble family.

"Hello," she said.

The Crumble family jumped as if they'd all received an electric shock. Finally Caroline stepped forward and bowed awkwardly.

"Your Majesty."

The rest of the family followed, with all of them bowing apart from Derek, who managed a curtsy.   

"And you are?" asked the President, gruffly.

"We're the Crumbles," said Derek Crumble. "This is my wife Caroline, and my son Billy, and this is Lizzie Crumble!"

"The Lizzie Crumble?" asked the President, staring at the banner. "I think you're in a lot of trouble young lady."

"Don't worry," said her father. "Wait till I get her indoors. She won't know what's hit her!"

 He turned to Lizzie, his face white with anger.

"I knew you were up to something! I just knew it! Billy? What the hell did she make you do?"

Lizzie nudged her brother. "Don't tell him anything. Not until he says please."

*

It started to rain and they all moved to the Colonel's tent. A large map-reading table was hastily erected and chairs found for them all. The Queen then suggested having some tea, and the President agreed, as long as he could have coffee, while the Prime Minister asked if they had any scones.  

Soon the conversation turned back to the flying saucer.

"What are we going to do?" muttered the President. "We can't have that thing hovering over our heads!"

"I know!" grumbled Derek Crumble. "It hasn't rained in months and that thing is acting like a blooming great umbrella stuck right over my blooming garden!"

He turned to the Prime Minister. "Sir...I know there's a hosepipe ban but do you think I can use my sprinkler? My lawn is dying of thirst!"

"Forget about your dam lawn!" shrieked the President, banging the table.

"That's all he ever thinks of," said Lizzie. "He's mostly vegetable himself."

The Prime Minister cleared his throat. "Can we get back to the small matter of the spaceship?"

He pointed to Lizzie and Billy. "You children are at the centre of this. You boy. What on earth did you do to get it here?"

Billy began to sob.

"Billy's very sensitive," explained his mother. "He doesn't like too much attention."                 

Lizzie on the other hand had no such problem. "We used my mobile!" she explained excitedly. "And a lot of batteries and dad's satellite dish."

"What!" spluttered Derek, spraying tea all over the table.

"It was my idea," continued Lizzie. "Billy's a genius with electronics you see, but I told him what to do."

"So you made a Walky-talky?" asked the President. "What was your message? What did you say?"

"I changed it from my original idea," said Lizzie as she removed a crumpled note from her back pocket. "We decided it should be a bit more proper and official." 

She began to read. "'Dear Aliens. My name is Lizzie Crumble, Ambassador from Earth. Me and my brother, Billy would like to invite you to my thirteenth Birthday party, today at seven o'clock. I live at 23 Ashton Road Barnet, England, the Earth. Ps, Live long and prosper.' The last bit was Billy's idea!"

Her brother's face turned bright red, and he slid further down the chair.

The American President looked completely dumfounded.

"We've spent billions of dollars sending out space probes, and you just...invited them to a party?"

Lizzie was about to nod but the Prime Minister raised his hand.

"Wait a minute. Radio signals take years to get to the stars. And you spoke to them only last night?"

"I think I can explain," said Colonel Brown. "Just a few hours ago one of our observatories spotted some activity on Pluto. It looks like something that had been buried there took off this morning."

"Well," said the Queen. "It would seem our alien friends have been on our doorstep all this time! And they haven't been bad neighbours so far, have they?"

"Hold it!" said the President. "Did you say the party starts at seven o'clock?"

He tapped his watch. "It's nine minutes to seven! If they turn up and no-one's there, it could be disastrous!"

The Prime Minister nodded his head. "The President is right! We should get over there on the double! We've got a party to organize. The most important party in the history of the world and we've got less then ten minutes to do it in!"

 

  

 

- CHAPTER FOUR -

   The Special Guest

 

Operation Party-pooper rolled into action at exactly seven minutes to seven. The Queen and Caroline Crumble made cucumber sandwiches in the kitchen, while Colonel Brown set up his map-reading table in the Crumble's front room, and quickly drew a diagram of the house.

"We need balloons here, here and here," he said, tapping the drawing with a long metal pointer. "Sergeant Pike, form a search party and scout the surrounding area for any shops, and also some party hats and..."

He stopped and turned to the President, who had begun chuckling quietly to himself.

"Is something the matter Mr President?" he asked stiffly.

The President chuckled once more. "No offence Colonel, but by the time you Brits have got your balloons and party hats, our alien friends will be on their way back to Pluto!"

"And I suppose you Americans could do better?" asked the Prime Minister sharply.

The president waved over a giant of a man who had been standing with the other 'Men in Black'. His suit looked even sharper then the others, (with trouser creases that could chop wood); his hair was shaved shorter, and his sunglasses looked even darker and shinier.

"This is Special Agent Steel," said the President proudly. "He'll get those Balloons a darn sight quicker then you Brits, won't you Agent Steel!"  

"Really?" said the Prime Minister. "I don't suppose you'd like to make a bet on that?"

*

"Well best of luck to you old chap," said Sergeant Pike, offering his hand to Special Agent Steel. "As you can see, I've drawn a line on the road with some chalk and my men are already behind it. So if you could join them, I'll blow my whistle and we'll be off." 

Agent steel didn't answer. Instead he and his men jogged right passed the starting line and down the rain-swept road.

"Well how rude!" exclaimed Sergeant Pike. "Listen men. The pride of the British army is at stake. It's time we taught those Yanks a lesson. Whatever it takes we must get some balloons before they do!"

Just then Derek Crumble came out of the house and started kicking a tank that was parked on the grass.

"Sergeant!" he roared. "Will you get that lump of metal off my front lawn!"

"Go back inside Mr Crumble!" shouted the Sergeant. "We've got important business to attend to!"

He called his squad to attention and they began to march off after Agent Steel and his men.

"What about this blooming tank?" bellowed Derek after them. He raised his foot to give it another kick, but stopped.

"I tell you what!" he called. "If you move this thing I'll get you all the balloons and party hats you can carry! Now do we have a deal or not?"

*

Exactly five minutes later, the door to the Crumble's front room burst open, and Agent steel and his men proudly squelched over to the President. They all saluted and Agent Steel thrust out his hand to reveal a single, rain sodden packet of balloons.

"Mr President! It took everything we had but..."

"Thank you Steel," growled the President. "But Sergeant Pike and his men have already dealt with the situation."

"But what about the Ballo..." Agent Steel stopped, the word caught in his throat; and for the first time since he and his men had rushed in, Steel realised that there was something different about the front room. Balloons. That was the difference. Balloons. There were balloons on the ceiling. Balloons on the walls. He had even waded through a sea of balloons scattered all about the floor!   

"Then...you won't be needing..."   

"No!" snapped the President. "We don't need any more Balloons!"

But Agent Steel wasn't the type to give up easily.

"Wait a minute sir!" he exclaimed. "The balloons all say 'Happy 100th Birthday!'"

"All thanks to Mr Crumble here," said the Queen. "He remembered that Mrs Piggott, from next door was having a birthday party as well. I sent her a Birthday card just the other day!"

Just then Agent Steel noticed that the President was wearing large Mickey Mouse ears (chosen by the Prime Minister, as he had won the bet they had made).

"Tell your men to put these on," barked the President, handing a pile of hats to him.

Everyone else was wearing a party hat as well, with the exception of the Queen, who had brought her crown, and Colonel Brown, who had insisted that he keep his beret on.

"Where are the Children?" asked Derek, who was looking extremely uncomfortable in a tall, princess's hat.

"Getting changed," said Caroline from underneath a pirate's hat. "They'll be down in a minute."

The doorbell rang.

"Oh my Goodness!" said the Queen. "Is anyone as scared as I am?"    

Everyone nodded.

The Prime Minister gulped. "Colonel," he said. "Would you let our guest in?"

Colonel Brown went out into the hallway and returned a few seconds later accompanied by a small, slim, silver skinned robot. He had a round, friendly looking face; and his eyes were two bright disks, glowing with curiosity. He had two arms, and hands that looked surprisingly human; but what made it obvious he was a robot was that he didn't have any feet. Instead his legs ended in a flat platform, which hummed quietly as he floated about.   

The little robot looked around inquisitively at everyone in the room - especially at their hats - then he floated over to the Queen. "Ambassador Lizzie?"

The Queen shook her head. "No, I'm the Queen."

He floated over to the Prime Minister, and the President and asked the same question.

"No I'm not Ambassador Lizzie, I'm the God Dam President!" exclaimed the President, his Mickey Mouse ears flapping with embarrassment.

"Well, begging your pardon," said the robot. "But where is Ambassador Lizzie?" 

As if she had been waiting for her cue, Lizzie Crumble flounced into the room, wearing a dress that was covered in bits of twigs and leaves that had been sprayed different colours.

"Greetings my Cosmic friend," she began. "My name is Lizzie Crumble. I am from the Earth," she said, touching the flowers. "And I am one with the Earth." 

"Have you been at my rose-bush?" growled her father.

At that moment Billy crept into the room as well. He was wearing a homemade 'Space Commander' costume he'd been secretly working on for months, complete with helmet, jetpack, and laser-gun.

"So that's where my hairdryer's got to!" exclaimed his mother.

The robot whizzed over to Billy, making him jump with fright.

"Are you Billy?" he asked.

Billy let out a squeak and nodded.

"I didn't know that you were a 'Space Commander' as well!" said the robot appreciatively.

Billy's knees started knocking together rather loudly.

"P-pardon?"

But the robot had turned back to Lizzie. He bowed and the single antenna on his head quivered excitedly as he began to speak.

"Ambassador Lizzie Crumble. On behalf of Empress Zamora, ruler of the Galaxy, may I congratulate you on becoming the first Ambassador from Earth."

Lizzie bowed back. "Thank you. And you are?"

"Sentinel Droid Max 450 at your service," he replied. "But I would be honoured if you'd call me Max."

"Pleased to meet you Max," said Lizzie, grinning from ear to ear. "I'm so glad you could make it!"

After that, the little droid was properly introduced to everyone in the room, some music was put on, and it wasn't long before everyone was having a great time (apart from Agent Steel who went around bursting balloons when no one was looking).

Max turned out to be the perfect guest, chatting to the Queen about her corgis, and talking diplomatically with the President and Prime Minister. He told Lizzie about the Galactic capital, which was called Vallakye, and the wonders of the Imperial Palace - and he even managed to give Derek Crumble some advice about manure (much to Lizzie's disgust).

Everyone was impressed with the little droid. Non-more so then Billy, who followed him around the room, his fear of crowds temporarily forgotten.

Finally, after an hour and a half, Max clapped his hands together.

"This has been a most wonderful party! I wish we could stay longer but the Empress is waiting to meet her newest Ambassador and we don't want to keep her waiting. Come along now Lizzie."

He began to guide Lizzie towards the hallway, but the Men in Black blocked his way.

"Just one minute Max," chuckled the President. "You can't just go around kidnapping children. It's not the done thing on Earth."

Max spun around to face him. "I don't understand."

The President chuckled again. "It was all a mistake Max. We should be in Washington right now. At the Whitehouse - not at some poky little house in Barnet!" 

"But Lizzie..."

"Is nothing but a child. A nobody. A nothing!"     

"Oh d-dear!" said Max nervously. "A Child! All the other Ambassadors have been trained diplomats."

"She isn't even housetrained," said her father.

"Excuse me!" yelled Lizzie. "Have I suddenly turned invisible or what?"

The President chuckled again. "There is a perfectly simple solution. One of us can go in her place."

Max shook his head, sending his antenna wobbling wildly.

"I've already spoken to Chizwick, the Imperial Vizier. The Empress is expecting Lizzie. If someone else turned up she would be extremely unhappy."

A worried look passed between the President and the Prime Minister.

"Umm..." began the Prime Minister, "...just how unhappy would she be?"

"She'd blow up the Earth," replied Max, as if blowing up planets was the sort of thing the Empress did most days. 

The president and Prime Minister exchanged glances and the President chuckled.

"Would you like to take her now?" he asked. "Agent Steel will help her pack. Won't you Agent Steel."

From the corner of the room came a loud bang. 

"Yes!" cried Lizzie, punching the air with her fist.

*

Agent Steel brought Lizzie's suitcases out from her bedroom, while Lizzie raided the fridge for some snacks for the trip. It was all going perfectly to plan. Better then she'd ever expected. She hurried out of the kitchen and found her mother and father grunting in the hallway. At first they'd said she couldn't go, but the President and Prime Minister soon made them realise they had no choice.

As she squeezed passed them, her mother suddenly burst into tears and turned away, and Lizzie wondered guiltily if she was remembering last nights dinner; when she'd told her she wasn't running away to anywhere on Earth. She felt an even sharper pang of guilt as she stopped outside Billy's room. He had disappeared inside when he'd realised she really was going and she knew he would be tucked up in his bed, crying his eyes out. Her hand reached for the door-handle. Saying goodbye was going to be the hardest part.

Suddenly, the door swung open, and a silver suitcase was thrust into the hallway.

"Hope I didn't take too long," said Billy, still wearing his Space Commander uniform. He began to drag the suitcase down the hallway. "I didn't know what to pack, because I've never been away before. So I packed everything!"

"Billy? What are you doing?" asked Lizzie.   

"What do you think I'm doing?" said Billy. "I'm going with you...like you promised."

Lizzie opened her mouth, but couldn't find anything to say - and to make matters worse their parents had come over to investigate.

"Billy? What are you doing out of your room?" asked their mother.

"Going with Lizzie of course," Billy replied. "She said I could. Didn't you Lizzie?"

"What!" growled their father.

Lizzie opened her mouth again, but again nothing came out. The plan seemed to be going slightly wrong.

"Even she wouldn't be stupid enough to take you with her," continued their father.

"Why not?" asked Billy.

"Because...because..."      

Billy stopped dragging his suitcase and turned to his parents. 

"Because I'm a chicken. A coward! Why can't you say it?"

"That wasn't what I was going to say," said his father.

"But its true anyway," said Billy. "And that's why I'm going! Because I'm sick of being afraid!"  

The President, Queen, Prime Minister and Max all squeezed into the hallway to see what the fuss was about.

Billy turned to the droid. "Max? Can I go with Lizzie?"

Max nodded. "If you want to Billy. I would like that a lot."

"See!" said Billy. "There's no reason why I can't go!"

"But why would you want to?" asked his mother. 

"Because I know that I can be somebody. I can do something to make you proud of me! You've got let me go! You can't hold me back!"

He stopped, his round chest rising up and down as he looked around desperately at the startled faces.

Eventually his father spoke. "Nobody wants to hold you back son," he said. "It's just that for your own good..."

"Don't say it's for my own good!" exclaimed Billy.

"I've lived my whole life doing what was good for me and...and..."

His head dropped down slowly. "Look at me," he said, his eyes filling with tears. "Look what I've become."

A trembling hand lifted his chin, and Billy found himself looking into his mother's concerned face.

"You really want to go Billy?" she asked.

Billy nodded. "Mum, I've got to!"

Caroline Crumble said nothing - but nodded slowly, her eyes fixed on her husband.

"Billy," began his father. "If you really want to do this then your mother and I won't stop you. But there's one condition. I'm going with you."

Lizzie looked at him horrified, and found that she could finally speak again.

"N-No way!" she stuttered. "You can't just hijack my spaceship. Don't you know why I've done all this? Why I got Billy to call them in the first place? To get away from you! I hate you. Don't you understand? I hate you!"

She looked around the hall. Everyone seemed embarrassed.

"But you don't know what he's like!" she pleaded.

Her mother shook her head. "Lizzie, he's your father."

"He's not my father. He's nothing like a father should be. He's more like a vegetable! A cold, unfeeling, heartless...Turnip!"

"Well then," said Derek Crumble, a grim smile spreading across his face. "It looks like I'm going to be the first Turnip in Outer Space."     

 

 

  

- CHAPTER FIVE -

The Short Goodbye

 

Caroline Crumble said goodbye to her children on their bone-dry front lawn, as all around them the rain poured down.

"Now you be good and do what your father says," she said, hugging them both.

"The first Turnip in space! I suppose he thinks he's funny!" said Lizzie, glowering in the direction of her father.

Derek was standing next to a withered looking tree, shaking his head while the Prime Minister and the President argued about what secret weapons they should give him.

"How about a sonic wrist watch?" suggested Special Agent Steel. "I can lend him mine."

"What does that do?" asked Colonel Brown, who was looking slightly green with envy.

"It can make a man unconscious at twenty metres," explained the President.

"That's nothing!" exclaimed the Prime Minister. "We've just developed a plutonium powered pen. It has a laser that can chop a man in half. Show them Colonel."

Colonel Brown reached into his uniform and took out a thick silver pen. 

"Let me see!" yelled Steel.

"No me!" yelled the President.

"Excuse me," said Derek, "if you don't mind, I've already got everything I need."

But by then the President, the Prime Minister, Agent Steel and Colonel Brown were all fighting over the pen.

Suddenly a burst of light shot out and the tree exploded into flames.

"As I said," continued Derek, "I don't really want any of that stuff. Anyway I've already got my gardening tools."

He pointed to the thick leather belt he was wearing and the pliers and clippers hanging from it."

"Look!" yelled the President. "You'll be dealing with dangerous aliens, not pruning apple trees!"

But Derek Crumble wouldn't budge. "I don't want to accidentally blow some aliens head off...supposing they have a head of course? Now where's that robot gone?"

Max had zipped up into the spaceship to allow Derek time to pack, but that had been over twenty minutes ago.

Suddenly a large door in the bottom of the saucer slid open and a small shuttlecraft came out and floated down to them. It was about fifteen metres long, with short stubby wings and a big window at the front.

"Wow!" cried Billy excitedly as it landed gently on the lawn in front of them. A door opened at the side, a ramp slid out, and Max floated down onto the grass.

"Chop, chop," he said. "No time to waste! Are we all ready?"    

"I am!" said Derek, desperate to get away from the President and Prime Minister. "Come on children!"

He picked up his rucksack, ran over to Lizzie and Billy, and picked up their suitcases.

"Seeya luv!" he said, and gave his wife a peck on the cheek.

"He's not very romantic, is he?" said the Queen.

"Now that's more like it!" shouted the President, who was still wrestling with the Prime Minister over the pen. "Can't wait to get out there and tangle with those Aliens eh?"

"No," said Derek. "It's still raining see...and the sooner we move that spaceship, the sooner my lawn gets watered!"

Derek and Max carried the suitcases into the shuttle, followed by Lizzie, (who was developing a major sulk), with Billy the last to go up the ramp. He climbed up slowly, his legs growing weaker with each step. He tried to pretend he was Space Commander, and that he had to save the Earth, and this helped him get as far as the shuttle door; but when he tried to step inside, he found he couldn't go any further.

His mother called up to him from the bottom of the ramp.

"Billy? You don't have to go. All you have to do is turn around, and you can be back in your room in a minute!"

Billy looked back. His mother was right. He could be safe in his bedroom, with a nice glass of warm milk. He wanted it so much it was real. So much that he could picture himself there, safe and protected by his four walls. But something was wrong. He was old. A little old man with grey hair sitting all alone at his table.

"No mum!" he said defiantly. "I'm going to be an astronaut!"

And with that, he turned back to the doorway and staggered inside. 

The ramp retracted, the door closed and the shuttle took off. For an instant Caroline Crumble could see her husband and son waving, and her daughter pouting. Then Billy stopped waving and covered his face with his hands. He was going to be sick. Her little boy was going to be sick and she couldn't do anything to help. She watched helplessly as a door in the giant saucer opened and the shuttle disappeared inside. Then, in a flash the saucer shot straight up, punching a hole in a rain-cloud that sent a heavy shower onto the Crumbles front lawn.

Caroline Crumble started to cry. "I don't know what I'm going to do without them," she whimpered.

"I know exactly what you're going to do," said the Queen, patting her arm. "You my dear are going to stay with me at Buckingham Palace."

 

   

- CHAPTER SIX -

The Pegasus

 

Lizzie looked on disdainfully as Derek Crumble cleaned her brother's face with a wipe he had taken from his rucksack.

"Sorry about the mess." said Derek apologetically. "If there's a mop I can clear it up."

"No need." said Max. He touched one of the controls. A panel in the wall opened, and a small round machine hovered over the mess and after it had passed, the floor was spotless.

There was a loud clunk as the shuttle docked inside the saucer. All the lights on the shuttle's control panel died and Max turned to Billy, who was looking slightly less green than he had done a few seconds earlier.

"How do you feel Billy?" he asked.

"I'm sorry," said Billy guiltily. "When I saw the ground drop away, it was like the window was a hole that would suck me out!" 

"You should have listened to mum and stayed home," said Lizzie.

Derek glared at his daughter.

She glared back. "Well its true!"

"You'll feel better once we get settled." Max assured Billy. "It's much nicer up top. And I think you might be a bit surprised!"

He winked mysteriously at Billy and led them out of the shuttle, along a large echoing hanger and into a lift. The lift whirred upwards and opened to reveal a large round room.

     "I don't believe it!" exclaimed Lizzie.

   Billy ran into the room and began to laugh, all his fears forgotten. He was standing in an exact duplicate of the bridge of the 'Pegasus'. The supercharged spaceship in 'Space Commander'.

   "Wow! It's just like on telly, only better!"

"It all works!" said Max enthusiastically. "The engines are controlled over there." he explained, pointing to a console covered in flashing lights.

"Quantum powered engines?" asked Billy hopefully.

   "With Nova Boosters!" grinned Max. "I've been working on it for hundreds of years. This is probably the fastest ship in the whole Galaxy!"

Billy ran around looking at all the controls. "I've dreamed of being on the 'Pegasus', fighting all the space-scum of the galaxy with Gawain at my side!"

"You're mistaken Billy," said Max, looking surprised. "There's no one in 'Space Commander' called Gawain."

"It's his imaginary friend," explained Lizzie. "Sad isn't it."

Billy sat down in the seat next to the pilot's chair.

"This must be navigation and weapons control! But how do you know about 'Space Commander?' I don't understand?"

"I do," said Lizzie. She pointed to a small room to their left that was half hidden behind a drape painted to look like a computer. In the room sat a sofa and a television.

Derek gulped as his picture appeared.   

"Look, we're on telly!"

They sat on the sofa, and heard all about themselves. Then the President and Prime Minister came on and started going on about how they'd decided to send an ordinary family to meet the aliens, to show that they meant no harm.

"What a load of tosh!" said Derek remembering the watch and pen they had tried to give him.

Next came Caroline Crumble, but every time she was asked a question, she burst into tears and started going on about her babies.

Lizzie reached over and switched it off.

They went back into the control room and Max sat Billy in the pilot's seat, and started showing him the controls.

"This is brilliant!" he yelled as he sent the saucer swooping one way, then another, much to Lizzie's irritation.

"So this is exactly like the 'Pegasus'?" she asked, walking over to the console.

Max nodded.

"Then if I press this button, the window should appear."

She prodded a large blue button. Instantly the wall in front of them dissolved, and they were facing a huge window showing the Moon, racing past them.

Billy screamed and leapt behind the pilots seat.

"What's wrong Commander Crumble?" asked Lizzie nastily.

"Oh yes You're afraid of heights! Not much use if you want to fly a spaceship."

"Do you want me to switch off the window?" asked Max, "Only it'd be a pity. Because we're passing some of the other planets in your system."

"Really?" replied Billy from behind the seat. "Lizzie? What are they like?"

Lizzie sighed, aware that her father was glaring at her. And for what? All she'd done was try to make Billy realise he should never have come. She was doing it for his own good.

"Well," she said eventually, "if you must know, we're  passing a small red planet."

"That's Mars!" said Billy excitedly.

"Yeah, like I said, it's small and red, or it was...it's gone now."

She stared out blankly for a few more seconds. "Oh, there are some rocks. You're really missing a lot."

Max skimmed over to the chair Billy was hiding behind.

"That's the asteroid belt. Jupiter is on the other side of the sun at the moment but we'll fly right past your sixth planet. What's it called?"

The top of Billy's head poked up from behind the chair. "Saturn!"

"It really is a lovely sight," continued Max. "There's not another planet like it in the whole galaxy! Here it comes now! Billy? Do you want to look?"

Billy gritted his teeth, grabbed the top of the seat pulled himself up, and opened his eyes. Once again he felt sick. The window was a hole pulling him out into space - then he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"It's beautiful. It really is beautiful!" exclaimed his father, and somehow the hole was no longer there. Just a window - and framed in it, drifting by at a crawl was Saturn!

It was the colour of dull gold, gleaming in the dim sunlight. Horizontal bands swept across its face, making it look like some huge butterscotch sweet that a careless giant had dropped. But that was only half of it. Surrounding it, without touching it at any point were the rings!

Billy pressed his nose against the window so he could see them better. They filled the sky, millions and millions of them, racing around the planet!

Saturn was gone too quickly and then there was nothing but stars, looking frosty cold in the blackness of space.

Billy felt the glass against his cheek tremble and the stars suddenly became streaks of light.

Max explained that the ship was now travelling at Hyper-light speed. Then his eyes seemed to darken and Billy noticed that his antenna began to wobble in a worried fashion.

"What's wrong?" asked Lizzie, who had also noticed the change in Max.

The little droid floated over to the communications console and as he did his antenna seemed to take on a life of its own.

"I must report to Chizwick," he said, his voice trembling. "Lizzie is not a trained diplomat. She wouldn't last a minute with the Empress."

"And you're going to tell Chizwick this?" asked Lizzie. "Thanks a lot!"

"A Max 450 cannot lie," said Max.

He smiled at the worried faces. "Don't worry. Chizwick is the cleverest man in the whole galaxy. He'll think of something."

The screen on the console flickered and Chizwick appeared. But he wasn't at all what they expected. His skin was a sickly blue. He wore a ridiculous looking fez with a feather stuck in it, and his eyes were red, as if he'd been crying.

"Oh dear! Oh dear!" he wailed after Max had explained the situation. "The new Ambassador is to be presented to the full Senate! If she messes up, the Empress will go mad!"

"This is the most intelligent man in the whole galaxy?" muttered Lizzie. "Can't I learn what to do?"

"Yes!" yelled Chizwick. "I've got it! Max, you will teach the girl how to behave like an Ambassador."

"But I'm not a protocol droid. I'm a Max 450." said Max.

"Don't argue!" hissed Chizwick. "Just do it! And do it right! The Empress is in a foul mood! A Foul Mood!"

"Why is everyone so frightened of this Empress?" asked Lizzie. "What's so bad about her?"

Chizwick let out a strangle cry and clapped his hands to the side of his face.

"What's so bad about her?" he yelped. "The Empress is the most vicious woman who has ever lived! If you don't learn how to behave in front of her, she'll vaporise you on the spot and your planet as well, just for good measure! Do I make myself clear?"

  

 

- CHAPTER SEVEN -

A Painful Lesson 

A few hours later, Lizzie began her lessons on how to behave in front of the Empress. Max taught her the simplest rule first. How to curtsey properly. When he was sure she had got that he went onto the difficult stuff. How to say hello to the Empress without getting your head chopped off.

While Max was teaching Lizzie, Billy and his father took the opportunity to explore Max's spaceship. There was nothing at all scary about it, apart from the central shaft that housed the lift used to travel from floor to floor, (and Billy was sensible enough to keep his eyes closed when he rode in it). If anything it was all quite boring and safe -just the sort of spaceship Billy liked to explore!

Most of the rooms turned out to be stuffed with things from Earth that Max had collected over the last thousand years. There were paintings and statues, and suits of armour. It was like a museum in space. But when they got to the very last room, at the top of the shaft, they found it full of things that looked like ray guns and jetpacks.

Billy pulled open a drawer. "Look dad. An anti gravity belt!"           

"Ah Billy..." said his father cautiously, as Billy put it on. "Max told us not to touch anything...and anyway, how do you know it's an anti-gravity belt?"

"It says so in the buckle Dad! Somehow it knows your language and changes so you can read it!"

Derek, who had never been any good at spelling, concentrated on the alien writing. It began to change before his eyes. Sure enough the writing was now in English. It read: 'Auntie gravy burp'.

"There are no buttons," said Billy. "How does it work?"

Derek frowned. "Maybe it works like the writing.Perhaps it just knows where you want to go. Anyway Billy, I think..."

   Billy had guessed the same thing and without any warning, he suddenly shot into the air! 

   "Look at me dad!" he yelled. "I'm flying!"

   He soared over his father's head and out of the room.

"You just have to think and it takes you wherever you want!" 

Derek ran after his son, who was now floating above the central shaft.

"Billy, come here now!"

But Billy was whizzing about, getting further and further from his father.

"This is brilliant dad!" he cried.   

"Come here now!" roared his father "And whatever you do, don't..."

But it was too late. Billy had looked all the way down to the bottom of the shaft, and had suddenly realised how high he was.

With a sudden cry, he started to fall!

His father leant over the rail and grabbed for him, but he was too far away.

"Think about flying back up to me!" he yelled, but Billy was falling faster and faster. The belt had read Billy's thoughts and knew that he was afraid of heights - and it was doing what he wanted, bringing him to the bottom of the shaft – only much, much too fast!

Suddenly a shiny figure appeared from below and caught Billy in mid-air. He floated up to Derek and placed Billy safely in his arms. The little droid ignored Derek's thanks and instead tore the belt from the boy and examined the buckle. For a second a look of surprise flickered in Max's eyes before they flashed bright with anger.   

"I told you," he said sternly. "I told you not to touch anything!"  

*

Derek and Billy stayed with Lizzie during the rest of that day. They didn't seem to mind, even though the lessons were deadly boring. Max twittered on about what knife and fork to use; what to do if your plate got up and wandered around the table, and a dozen other stupid dinner rules.

Lizzie hated all of it. It was nothing like she had expected and it didn't help that Max kept reminding her if she made a single slip up, then the Earth would be destroyed.

The next day Max taught them about Galactic history. And this wasn't half as boring as they thought it would be. He explained that before the first Empress was crowned, the galaxy had been ruled for thousands of years by a race of warrior wizards known as the Kapuri. He told them that the Kapuri had incredible powers, and had always used them for good; until their leader, who was called Greiogar, turned evil. Most of the Kapuri joined Greiogar and all the other alien races fought against them in a terrible war that destroyed half the galaxy. 

Billy listened spellbound. It was just like something from Space Commander. And Max turned out to be an excellent storyteller; illustrating desperate dogfights between spaceships with big sweeps of his arms; and clashing his hands together when he told of the terrible final battle, when the last of the Kapuri were killed and Greiogar vanished. Then it got boring when he described the very first Empress, who was crowned immediately after the War. She had been Empress Zamora's great Grandmother and the most beautiful woman in the Galaxy, with jet-black hair that had a streak of ruby red running through it.

Lizzie perked up at this point, listening intently as Max described her Coronation and her Wedding-dress, and how all the children in the galaxy had had a day off school.

Then Max got serious again. His eyes grew dark and he lent closer, as if he was sharing some terrible secret. 

"...but just as the Empress was about to be crowned, someone started laughing. A horrible, evil, spiteful laugh...and it wasn't just at the Coronation. The laughter was everywhere! All over the Galaxy. It was Greiogar!"

Billy gulped and looked at his father. He was staring at Max, his mouth hanging open.

"Greiogar swore and cursed at the Empress and all the races that had fought him," continued Max. "But worst of all, he said he would return one day and lay the universe in ruins. And that this would happen if just one person in the whole Galaxy ever celebrated the birthday of 'The Scarlet Empress!'"

"Wow!" exclaimed Billy his eyes wide with amazement.

"That sounds more like a fairy-tale than proper history!" tutted Lizzie. She sat with her arms crossed and plainly hadn't believed a single word.

"The lesson hasn't ended yet," said Max ominously. His voice grew quieter, until it was barely a whisper.

"Just like you, the very first Empress didn't believe Greiogar. She chose a husband from one of the ambassadors and a child was born; a girl who grew up to be the next Empress. She had black hair, like her mother's, and a ruby red streak...only the red streak was twice as wide as in her mother's hair! This Empress also had a child. A woman who grew up to be Empress Zamora's mother. Her hair was completely red, apart from a black streak. Everyone tried to warn her against having a child. But she was strong willed and married anyway."

Billy shivered as he guessed what was coming next. 

"The day Empress Zamora was born was a terrible day!" continued Max. "For just as everyone had feared, the baby was born with a full head of red hair! Empress Zamora is 'The Scarlet Empress!' As soon as she was born terrible things started to happen. She was no more then a few hours old when her father was found dead. Some say he killed himself, others say he was murdered. Her mother blamed the child. She stayed with the baby for two years, but showed her no warmth or tenderness. Then she too disappeared, and the Empress was put under the protection of General Blott, the head of the Imperial Army."

"What's this Blott fellow like?" asked Derek.

"A ruthless killer," replied Max. "During the war with the Kapuri, he killed millions of innocent people just so he could test some new weapons. Blott raised the Empress to be wild and to do whatever she wanted. While Chizwick on the other hand tried to teach her the difference between right and wrong. Blott hasn't taken kindly to what he calls Chizwick's interference. He regularly tries to kill him - especially since Chizwick brought a mysterious new Security droid called Rex to protect the Empress. All the palace droids are under Blott's control. But Rex is special. He's a Rex 1000! The only one! Nothing can control him. Even Greiogar cannot affect him." 

     "I bet he's not a patch on you though," said Billy.

     Max sighed and his eyes grew even dimmer. "Billy," he said, "I know you believe that. But the truth is, I'm old. Obsolete. I have been for the past eight hundred years. While I've been waiting on Pluto the other droids have got much much smarter than me. It's time that I told you. When we get back to Vallakye I'll probably be melted down for scrap."     

 

  

 

- CHAPTER EIGHT -

The Court of the Scarlett Empress

 

Lizzie sighed with relief when they finally arrived at Vallakye. Her head was so full of useless facts, thinking about anything felt like wading through treacle.

     As soon as they were in orbit, the communication screen burst into life and Chizwick's anxious face appeared.

"Come to the Imperial Palace immediately," he said, his lips trembling. "The Empress wants to show you off."

They took the shuttle down to the Imperial Palace and landed on a big round pad at the top of a giant tower. The shuttle door opened and Max floated out, carefully leading Billy, his head once again covered in sunglasses and earphones.

"I'm sorry Max," mumbled Billy. "I'm such a baby."

He had taken a short nap and had a nightmare about his friend being melted down. This had got him worrying about everything else and before he'd known it, he'd grown scared of his own shadow again.

     Derek came out and dumped his rucksack and Billy's and Lizzie's suitcases on the floor. It was cold. A strong wind was blowing.

"Bit nippy isn't it Max? Oh hello!" he said, noticing two stocky black droids skimming over. "A welcoming committee. Pleased to meet you."

     "I'm supposed to say that!" snapped Lizzie as she stomped down the ramp. "I am the Ambassador!"

     She turned to the two droids and felt the nudge of the videocassette in the canvas shoulder bag she was wearing. 

     "Pleased to meet you..." she began.

     The two droids turned their backs on her and sped off towards a round building in the middle of the pad.

     "Stop!" cried Lizzie. "I haven't finished!"   

     "They're General Blott's droids," said Max. "We'd better follow them."

He steered Billy and Lizzie ahead of him, while an arm shot out from a panel in his back, and grabbed their father.

     "Wait a minute!" protested Derek, as he was dragged along. "What about our stuff?"

     The two droids spun round without stopping, raised their arms, and their luggage burst into flames.

     "Did you see that!" yelled Lizzie. "Charming! Is this how they treat all the new ambassadors?"

     They reached the round building and two doors opened to reveal a large lift. As soon as they were all inside, the doors slammed shut with a sharp 'thwack' and they began to drop down.

When the lift doors opened again, they found Chizwick waiting for them. Lizzie tried her best not to snigger when she saw him. He was tiny! Even shorter than Billy, and his clothes were about two sizes too big for him. She managed to keep a straight face as she glanced at his baggy black trousers, and giant yellow shirt; and she just about stopped a smirk at the sight of his bright red fez with the blue feather sticking out of the top that kept sliding down over his eyes. But she couldn't stop herself when she saw the ridiculous long green cloak he was wearing, especially when he turned to them and tripped over it.

"Do that in front of the Empress and the smirk will be burnt off your face!" snapped Chizwick.

It had the desired effect. The grin vanished and Lizzie began to suspect that the little Vizier was perhaps not quite ridiculous as he looked.

Chizwick crossed his arms and looked her up and down, sometimes nodding, sometimes shaking his head, and sometimes tutting to himself.

Lizzie shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. She was sure there was nothing he could complain about. She had chosen a boring blue cotton dress, and she had even brushed her hair and tied it back into a huge frizzy, yellow ponytail. It was the nicest she had looked in years!

Finally he cleared his throat. "Imagine I am the Empress. How do you address me?"

     "Your Majesty," answered Lizzie.

     "The Empress burps. What do you do?"

     "Beg her forgiveness."

"How many Ambassador's are there?"

     "Twenty two thousand and seventy. Not including me."

"You are right not to include yourself as I doubt you will survive the next few minutes!" said Chizwick coldly. "The Empress is waiting in the Stateroom! Follow me."

He turned on his heels, tripped over, and began to lead them along a passage towards two enormous doors. Lizzie quickly glanced back to the two droids who had stayed at the lift. There was nothing she could do but stick her tongue out at them. She realised it wasn't very ambassador-like, but she did it anyway.

The two doors ahead of them opened and Lizzie's burnt luggage was instantly forgotten. The room on the other side was vast. It was more than vast. It was a whole county! To the left and right of her she could just make out distant walls hundreds of metres high. Above her she could see the arches of a roof almost lost in cloud, and in front of her rolled a flower meadow, with gentle hills that led down to a group of lakes, glimmering at the foot of distant, snow capped mountains!

A large round dish-like platform floated over to them and Chizwick hurried them on to it. Railings grew around the edge and suddenly they were in the air. They flew quickly, skimming the meadow and covering the distance to the lakes in seconds. These flashed below them like quicksilver, and then they began to climb, rising up into the clouds as they flew over the ice-covered mountain peaks.

Max described it all to Billy, who had moved one of the earphones and was trembling with a mixture of terror and excitement as his descriptions grew more dazzling. In the end, Billy couldn't contain his curiosity any longer. He lifted up his sunglasses, peeked out and gulped.

The clouds had thinned out, but they were still high in the air. And ahead of them floated the Imperial Senate - a giant stadium seating all the Ambassadors from all over the Galaxy. Over twenty two thousand aliens of every size, shape, colour, and smell! It was too much. Billy pulled his glasses back over his eyes. They looked too real. Nothing like his imaginary friend Gawain!

The platform drifted towards the middle of the stadium and docked with another platform. Two huge metal figures were waiting there. The nearest was a robot standing at least four metres tall. This was obviously Rex, the Empress's personal bodyguard. Like Max, his legs ended in a large float-plate (only it was vastly bigger than the one Max had). A huge chest grew from his waist, and from his massive shoulders hung two deadly looking blasters. His head had an equally massive square jaw, but his eyes were tiny. Glowing red like two small lumps of fiery coal. His ears were odd as well. They were two radar dishes constantly spinning around. Lizzie thought he looked like a cross between a bulldog and a nightclub bouncer; but one thing was for sure - he was very, very dangerous.

     The other Giant figure was General Blott. At first glance he seemed like Rex's bigger and uglier twin; with a hulking great metal body, covered in battle scars and laser burns. He had four giant blaster arms compared to the two Rex had; and on each of his shoulders sat a golden statue of a winged Gargoyle. The Gargoyle on his right shoulder had two short horns, making it look like a little devil, while the one on his left shoulder had two, long, vampire fangs. A head sat perched between the Gargoyles, almost lost in the giant helmet that covered it. It had grey blotchy skin, and a metal patch hid one of its eyes. The other eye, however, was alive with malice, scanning them for points of weakness to attack. 

The Empress stepped out from between the two hulks. At first she looked tiny and insignificant next to her two huge escorts, but as she stepped towards them, that impression soon changed. She was tall and thin, with fiery red hair, just as Max had described; and she had a sharp face, with a pointed chin and a thin curved nose; and pale, icy blue eyes that were as cold as the vacuum of space.

"Chizwick!" she snapped, "I have been waiting for ages! Get on with it!"

Chizwick cleared his throat. "Your Majesty. Ladies and gentleman...and creatures that do not fall into those categories. May I present our newest Ambassador, all the way from Earth. Ambassador, Lizzie Crumble!"

Lizzie stepped forward and curtseyed just as Max had shown her, and to her great relief, the Empress began to laugh.

"Charming! Positively charming."

She turned to Derek, Billy, and Max.

"Are these the creatures who accompanied you from Earth?"

"Yes your Majesty," said Lizzie. She had it all planned. She would introduce her father and Billy and then deliver the speech she had been secretly working on, about peace and friendship; and at the end, all the other ambassadors would cheer, and the Empress would adopt her and - 

Lizzie realised that her father was watching her, and on his face hung a familiar expression. It was the look she'd seen when they'd buried Billy's goldfish. It was one of utter disappointment.

"We are waiting!" hissed the Empress.

Lizzie nearly jumped out of her skin. "S-sorry your Majesty," she stammered. Her moment of triumph was gone. Somehow he'd ruined it - but she would make him pay.

"This is my brother Billy."

She tapped him on the shoulder and Billy bowed, just as he'd practised.

     "And this!" she said pointing to her father. "Is the first Turnip in outer space!"

She waited for laughter to erupt, but everyone remained quiet. They had taken her seriously, and her father's expression had grown even more disappointed. That made Lizzie madder then ever.

"He is extremely dangerous and can bore anyone to death from a hundred metres!"

An appreciative gasp filled the stadium; even the Empress was impressed.

"Very good," she said "But enough about the dangerous Turnip. Now who is this?"

The Empress was peering at Max. All of a sudden she began sniggering and soon she was giggling like a hyena on laughing gas.

"Crumps! I don't believe it!" she bellowed. "Look everyone, it's a Max 450! I thought they'd been all melted down! Hello? Can you understand me? Can you speak?"

Max's antenna drooped and he began to stutter. "Y-your M-majesty I...I... "

Soon the whole stadium was roaring with laughter. Rex and General Blott had joined in - but the loudest, cruellest laughter was coming from the Empress. She started jerking her arms and head about, shouting: "Y-YOUR MA-JES-TY!" over and over again.

Max seemed to crumple. His eyes grew dim while the laughter just grew louder and louder till it seemed that it would never ever stop! 

"Leave him alone! He's not stupid! He's brilliant!"

Suddenly twenty two thousand aliens gasped – and there was silence.

Billy gulped and looked about. Somehow, he'd thrown his earphones and sunglasses on the floor, and now a stadium full of aliens was staring at him. It was just like one of his nightmares! He felt his heart beat faster as he bent down to pick up his sunglasses. He knew if he put them on, he would be safe. Then he saw Max, his eyes bright with admiration, and suddenly he didn't feel so scared.

Billy stood up and took a deep breath. "Max is a brilliant robot," he continued, "and...and a million times better than...than a Rex 1000 any day!"

A gasp echoed around the stadium. Billy pinched himself. It wasn't a dream. He really had just told the whole Galaxy off - and the strange thing was he wasn't scared at all. In fact for the first time in his life, he actually felt brave!

"Who are you again?"

It was then that Billy saw the Empress for the first time. She began tapping her long fingernails against the side of a giant metal statue. Fingernails that Max had warned were full of acid!

"Commander..." Billy stopped himself. "B-Billy Crumble, your Majesty."

He heard a growl then realised that the statue beside the Empress wasn't a statue at all. He gulped.

"Guess what?" said the Empress, her eyes gleaming. "This is Rex." 

Billy gulped again. The growl grew louder.

"Normally I would allow Rex to disintegrate you for insulting him." she continued. "But it just so happens that in a few days we are hosting the annual Droid Destruction Derby. Rex has won it for the last two years and we all thought General Blott might beat him this year."

She indicated the statue to her right. Billy gulped a third time when he realised it was grinning at him.

The Empress continued. "But that was before a droid a million times better turned up!"

All around the stadium sniggering broke out again. But Billy could only hear the cold, inhuman laughter coming from Rex.

"Max will win!" he squeaked. "I bet my life on it!"

"That's exactly what you have done. Both yours' and the Droids'! But enough of this. I'm getting bored."

The Empress darted an icy look at Chizwick.

On this signal he leapt into the air, clapped his hands together, and spoke, his voice booming around the vast room.

     "The Senate is now adjourned." 

     Another fanfare trumpeted and the stadium broke into a thousand platforms, which quickly carried the other Ambassadors off to distant corners of the vast room.

     General Blott turned to the Empress and the fanged Gargoyle on his left shoulder began to speak.

     "With your permission, the General will..."

     "...retire to his ship," continued the horned Gargoyle on his right shoulder.

     He bowed to the Empress, and then rose swiftly into the air.

As soon as they were alone, the Empress tapped at a  large green ring on the middle finger of her right hand.

Suddenly, a beautifully decorated wooden door appeared, floating in the air in front of her.

Chizwick sprang into action. "Where to Ma'am?"

     "My yacht of course!"

The Vizier fumbled with a large blue ring he was wearing and hurriedly opened the door, allowing the Empress and Rex to disappear inside.

"Bring the new Ambassador!" barked the Empress, sounding strangely distant.

Chizwick clicked his fingers. "Quickly now, into the Corridor with you!"

He hopped through the doorway, closely followed by Lizzie, her eyes wide with wonder. Her father and Max came next, with Billy, last as usual. He stared into the floating doorway, unable to believe his eyes.

"Close the blooming door!" echoed the Empress's voice. It was coming from deep inside a long, ornately decorated corridor.

Billy could see his sister and father and Max moving along it. Getting further and further away. Reluctantly he stepped into the passage and closed the door behind him. It vanished and he was suddenly filled with dread.

At the opposite end of the corridor was another wooden door. Chizwick skittered ahead and opened it, just in time to allow the Empress to flounce through, followed by Rex. The rest of the party stumbled out seconds later, with Billy in the back pushing so hard they all landed in a heap on the floor.

   Chizwick let out a worried sigh, closed the door, and as soon as it clicked shut, it disappeared. 

They were no longer in the vast Stateroom. Instead they had emerged into a room that reminded Lizzie of a small safari park, only it wasn't full of animals. Instead the wildlife consisted of moving furniture! The ground shook as a herd of big comfortable chairs galloped past them, chased by a pack of small tables snapping at their legs. The tables seemed to lose interest in the chase and they settled down to rest in the thick, grass-like carpet that grew below the only window in the room. Lizzie looked out of it, expecting to see the rest of the Empress's palace. She gasped and ran across to get a better view, sending the tables scooting away in alarm. Derek and Billy followed her, unable to believe their eyes. They were no longer on the planet. They had travelled less than thirty metres, but somehow they were on a spaceship, orbiting high above the clouds!     

   "Crumps! My feet are killing me!" exclaimed the Empress.

She leant back and was just caught by a heavily padded sofa that had been gazing out the window. She looked over to Lizzie, Derek, and Billy.

   "Well, sit down!"

   They each perched awkwardly on chairs that had crept up to them. 

   "I'd imagine you must be hungry after your trip," said Chizwick timidly.

"What a great idea!" exclaimed the Empress.

Chiswick arranged lunch and soon they were all sitting round a table brimming with alien looking dishes of food.

Lizzie found herself next to the Empress who was busy scooping what looked like yellow slugs onto her plate.

"These are Moon-scallops," she said. "But if you like, you can have Earth food."

They all nodded eagerly and within seconds they each had an empty plate placed in front of them.

"Max gave me details of every dish from your planet," explained Chizwick. "It's programmed into your plates. Just tell them what you'd like."

Lizzie looked down at her plate. It was large and deep, like a bowl. Part of the rim was thickened and at its widest point was a microphone.

"I'd like some vegetable soup please," she said cautiously.

The inside of the plate began to shimmer with light, and when it faded it was full of hot vegetable soup. Lizzie picked up a spoon and tasted it. It was delicious.

Billy tried his plate next and ordered pepperoni pizza; while, much to Lizzie's disgust, her father asked for chips, peas, and spam fritters.

For afters, Lizzie had ice cream while Billy and his father chose treacle tart with custard. The plates turned out to be self-cleaning, so there was no need to change them. They were just polishing off a second helping when Lizzie remembered something she'd wanted to ask.  

   "Your Majesty," she began, "that really is a remarkable invention with the rings. What's it called?"

    "The corridor!" said the Empress excitedly. "It's brilliant isn't it! Brand new you know. Tell them Chizwick."   

    "It's a wormhole," explained Chizwick. "A tunnel in hyper-space. The Empress's ring creates the opening and...and my ring makes the exit. You can travel anywhere you want in the whole universe!"

"That's brilliant your Majesty!" said Lizzie.

    "You didn't like it though, did you?" said the Empress to Billy, who had stopped eating as soon as the Corridor was mentioned.

   "Billy's scared of everything," explained Lizzie. "He has been ever since he was a baby."

"Well he'll have to get a lot braver if he's to ride in the Droid Destruction Derby," said the Empress.

"Pardon, your Majesty?" said Billy.

The Empress giggled cruelly. "Didn't I explain? Every droid has a rider. Chizwick is Rex's rider. Remember last year when you were nearly knocked off by General Blott?"

Rex began to growl.   

"I understand it looked quite amusing," said Chizwick.

"I laughed so much I nearly fell off my throne!"

She turned to Billy and Max. "You better watch out for Blott. He plays dirty."

"With your permission, I will start training them tomorrow," said Chizwick. "The course is quite complicated and I would like to point out the more obvious dangers."

"D-dangers?" repeated Billy.

"Yes!" exclaimed the Empress, clapping her hands together. "There are traps all along the route and at least half the riders die, or are horribly injured. It's simply terrific!"

 

 

- CHAPTER NINE -

Winning is Everything

 

They used the Corridor to travel down to Vallakye the next morning, after what had been a very uncomfortable night for Billy and his father. This was because Lizzie had learnt from the Empress that she was in charge of anyone from Earth. When she'd realised what this meant, she had ordered their father to bed; and when Billy had complained she had ordered him to bed as well. She'd been even worse at breakfast, making their father wear a bib, and calling him a Turnip in front of everyone. So when it had been time to start training, Billy had been more than happy to go.

For the rest of the morning, Chizwick taught Billy and Max the basics about droid riding, while Derek offered words of encouragement. They were training on the track where the race would be run and the course was full of dozens of other droids and their riders, ducking and weaving through imaginary obstacles as if their lives depended on it.

"Don't worry son," said Derek. "You'll soon be showing them a thing or two."

But after a few hours Billy realised the only thing he could show anyone was how to loose. He'd managed to master the riding part. And he wasn't feeling half as sick as the first time he'd got on. What worried him though, was that Max was so small, and he was so big and heavy.

By the time the first days training was over they were both exhausted and a lot less confident then they had been when they'd started.

"You're doing fine," said Derek.

"We will win dad, I promise!" said Billy, his face set with determination. And somehow Derek knew his son would. Not because he wanted to, or to save his own life - but because losing meant that Max would be melted down - and he would never let that happen.  

Training continued in the mornings for the next few days, with Billy and Max showing little improvement. They would have liked to have trained more, but in the afternoons they all had to accompany the Empress while she used the corridor to explore the galaxy. Lunchtimes were usually spent in the Orion Nebula, and afternoon tea was generally held in an asteroid belt made up of diamonds the size of planetoids. It was exactly what Billy had dreamed of doing, ever since he'd seen the first ever episode of Space Commander. And it would have been brilliant, but for Lizzie. She teased and humiliated their father mercilessly. And the strange thing was, the more horrible she was, the more the Empress took a liking to her.

On the evening before the race they visited a planet in the very heart of the Galaxy, where a thousand suns lit up the sky. It was a completely dead world, with not one shrub of greenery; and Lizzie had liked it so much the Empress had given it to her.

"I name this planet Weed-free world," she announced. "There's no plant life at all! Except of course, for the Turnip!"

She had therefore been very annoyed when Blott caught her father planting some sunflower seeds he'd been keeping in his dungarees. So annoyed that she had all the seeds vaporised.

"You've gone to far this time!" hissed Billy, when the Empress wasn't looking. "All dad wanted to do was plant some seeds."

"On my planet!" hissed his sister back. "No-one invited him along. In fact he wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for you! Anyway, you've got enough to worry about, like how on earth Max is going to win tomorrow, with a blob like you on his back!"

 

 

 - CHAPTER TEN -

The Droid Destruction Derby

 

The next day, Billy got up early, with Lizzie's words still ringing in his ears. The giant racetrack was empty, and for once they were able to travel the whole circuit without any interference. The course was shaped like a giant figure of eight, with four long straights that met at a crossroads at the middle, and two large curving arcs at either end.

Max timed them as they raced round. It took them fifteen minutes to go round twice. This wasn't very encouraging, as the record was eight minutes, held by Rex and Chizwick.

They went round again and this time they took fifteen and a half minutes. Billy shook his head. Even before Lizzie's remark, he'd been starving himself, but he had only lost four kilograms. Not nearly enough to make any difference.

    "I think I'll get a top up recharge," said Max, trying his best to sound confident. "We'll show them Billy. Don't you worry!"

Billy tried to smile. He waited at the trackside while Max disappeared into a tunnel to find a recharge station.

Spectators had begun filling the seats around the track and other competitors had started to arrive. He recognised a sleek green racing droid, ridden by a stick insect with two big bulbous eyes. Beside them floated a huge tank of a droid, twice as big as anything else in the race. Its rider was an immense black and white alien that looked to Billy like a killer whale with arms. During training they'd been even slower then he and Max. Billy couldn't see why they were even bothering to enter.

He was staring at an even odder-looking alien and droid, who reminded him of Mrs Piggott in her wicker chair, when he was tapped on the shoulder.

He turned around, expecting to see Max, but instead he found himself facing a creature half his size, who's body was hidden by a black, hooded robe.

"Yes?" said Billy timidly.

"I've watched...training," said the creature. "...will lose."

"Pardon?" said Billy. It was as if the creature was only saying half of each sentence.

"...this you...win!" continued the figure in the same stuttering way; and as he spoke, a gold metallic arm was thrust out from the robe. It held a green pill.         

    Billy stepped back. "What does that do?"

 The figure stepped forward. "...it...will win!"

Billy took another step back. "No thank you I..."

"Makes...thin!"

"Thin?" Billy took a hesitant step forward and took the pill in his hand, holding it up to the light.

"It makes me thin? Why are you giving it to me?" But when he looked down the figure was gone.

"Billy!" called Max, zipping out the tunnel. "Are you ready to race!" The little droid seemed full of nervous energy and his eyes were glowing like two tiny suns.

"Good luck son!" cried a voice.

Billy looked up to see his father and sister, sitting next to the Empress in the Imperial box.

By now the stadium was full and all the competitors were lining up. They took their place at the start, and Chizwick pulled alongside them, perched precariously on Rex's shoulders.

"Watch out for Blott!" he called down. "I've just heard he's planning something against the two of you!"

"Us?" cried Billy. "But why?"

"I don't know? Perhaps he thinks we might help you and that will slow us down. He'll do anything to see Rex and I beaten."

Rex growled in agreement  

Billy nodded his thanks and realised just how hopeless their position was. Not only were they the second slowest team in the race, but now Blott was after them!

He thought about what would happen to Max after they lost, uncurled his hand, and popped the green pill in his mouth. It melted instantly away, leaving a strange, alien taste.

"Don't worry Billy," said Max. "There's something Blott hasn't counted on. While I was queuing for the recharge station someone gave me something."

"What?" asked Billy, felling suddenly sick.

"It was a little robot with gold skin. I couldn't see much of him because he was wearing some silly robe, and he talked strangely...but he gave me a power pill! I'd only ever heard about them. They make any droid ten times faster and stronger then normal!"

"You've taken it already?" asked Billy, feeling the sickly taste slide down his stomach.

Max nodded in agreement, so fast that his head rattled.

Just then General Blott pulled up on the other side of them. He was grinning from ear to ear.

Max reared up, almost throwing Billy off. "We're on to you, you know!" he cried defiantly. "And I've got a few tricks up my sleeve! What's wrong? Got nothing to say?"

Then Max realised why the General had nothing to say. The two Gargoyles were missing from his shoulders; instead they were sitting on his float plate, removing the robes they had been wearing. They soon took their places on Blott's shoulders, and the General's grin grew even wider.

"May the..."

"...Best droid..."

"...Win!"

     Max began to shake violently. "It was Blott! He gave me the power pill? But why? That would only make us go faster!"

Billy felt the effect of his own pill travel to every corner of his body and knew without a doubt what Blott was planning.

"He wants us to win. If we beat Rex and Chizwick, they would be the laughing stock! I think he hates them so much he'd do anything to humiliate them. Even let us win."

"But how?"

Billy never got a chance to answer as trumpets blared, and the excited chattering that had grown around the racetrack suddenly stopped.

He looked up to the Imperial box. The Empress was standing up, holding a red silk scarf. She let it go, and as it floated down to the racetrack floor, Billy could feel Max shake with barely contained energy, while his own body began to pinch and pull inside his skin.     

The scarf touched the ground. The race was on! Billy felt Max surge forward, and his arms were nearly pulled from his sockets as he tried to keep his grip. The wind tore at his face and the whine of antigravity units filled his ears, while all around them, the crowd roared with excitement.

Billy blinked away tears from his eyes and looked either side of him. Rex and General Blott were just ahead. Chizwick had his eyes closed and his head down, having lost his fez in the first few seconds of the race. Blott's face was fixed on the track ahead, but the two Gargoyles were looking directly at Billy and Max.

A green shape darted past Blott. It was the droid ridden by the stick insect. He whizzed through the crossroads and surged ahead, building a commanding lead before slowing as he entered the long curve at the top of the track.

Seconds later Billy turned into the curve flanked by Rex and Blott. He had expected to find the green droid in the distance but he had slowed even more and was weaving through a forest of stone pillars that had appeared along the route. More pillars were shooting up from the ground every second, but the agile green droid was having no trouble darting around them.

Billy glanced back. The other racers had slowed down as well; ready to carefully pick their way through the pillars – except for one.

Billy blinked. The wind was forcing more tears into his eyes, but he could see that one of the racers had picked up speed. It was the Giant tank. He was surging forwards, forcing five racers who couldn't get out of the way directly into the pillars!

Billy turned forwards as the first pillars swept by them. They managed to weave around the next two, but suddenly a pillar shot up directly in front of them. Billy could hear Max's antigravity units scream as he tried to change direction to avoid it, but although his body felt like it was on fire, he still hadn't grown thin. Then it happened. He was suddenly skinny!

Billy and Max both screamed as they shot up into the air, sailing easily over the Pillar.

"What happened!" cried Max.

Billy stretched forward and shouted in his ear. "A pill!"

They sailed over the pillars, watching the frantic darting of the rest of the racers below them. The green droid had reached the last pillar and Rex and Blott were about half way through, racing neck and neck, while behind them the massive droid pushed a terrified wave of droids straight into the forest of stone! It was almost too horrific to watch, the trapped droids did their best to dart through the pillars, while behind them the massive alien made no effort to dodge them, or even slow down. He simply ploughed through the stone columns like they weren't there; and he did the same thing to the riders in front of him.

"They're being wiped out!" cried Billy. "Why don't they come up here?"

"I think I know why!" yelled Max. "Look ahead!"

The dark opening of a tunnel loomed where the curve of the track ended, and a worried feeling passed through both of them when they saw the green racer zip into it, followed by Rex and Blott.

"We'd better drop down!" cried Billy.

Max began to descend, but before he reached the top of the pillars he bounced back up again.

"Some kind of force-field!"           

They flew on, over the tunnel and noticed that the crowd was laughing at them.

Further ahead a tiny dot began to grow. There seemed to be a droid heading right for them. It was a Max 450, and riding it was a strangely familiar, but very skinny boy!

Max tried to dodge them but the other droid seemed intent on hitting them. At the very last moment, Max made one last desperate turn but the other droid matched them, and at a dizzying speed, the two droids met!  

The air around them rippled, and the other droid was gone. But somehow, they were floating, unmoving, at the beginning of the course – and everyone was laughing at them.

"Thought you could cheat!" roared the Empress from above them. "You'd better get a move on! Twice around for you!"

Something shot past them. It was the green Droid.

    Billy groaned. Coming up behind them fast were Rex and Blott and the rest of the droids - and Blott didn't look too pleased at all!

"We can still win!" cried Max. "Come on Billy!"

He accelerated forward so fast that Billy's head was snapped back. They rocketed through the crossroads and into the curve and the forest of pillars, hardly slowing at all.

Billy clung tightly to Max as they danced between the stones. He could just about hear an appreciative gasp growing from the crowd, when all of a sudden it was cut off and they were in the tunnel. It was pitch black, and eerily quiet.

"What happens here?" asked Billy. He felt Max's shoulders rise in a shrug.

"Lets have a look."

A beam of light shot out from Max's chest, and at the same instant, Billy heard a fizzing sound from above them. He looked up, just as something burst from the ceiling of the tunnel.

"Max!" cried Billy.

The little droid, surged forward, mainly from fright, and a giant metal needle missed them both by centimetres.

Billy reached forward and covered the spotlight.

"Turn it off!" he cried.

The light died and Billy started to shake with fear. He had glimpsed the tunnel ahead of them and had seen four more needles like the one that had nearly got them; and skewered by each needle, like butterflies on pins, hung a droid and rider.          

They emerged into the light and Billy felt sick. He wasn't sure if it was the pill, or the buffeting about he was getting, or their passage through the tunnel. They had been able to miss the needles by staying away from the moans and cries of the droids and their riders. But as the roar from the crowd grew, he found he could still hear them echoing in his head.

"Look Billy!" cried Max. "We're catching up!"

The crossroads was ahead of them, full of racers passing through from the opposite side. They were catching up! The green racer was just in front, its insect rider staring angrily back at them.

   The insect chattered to his droid and they surged forwards as the last of the other racers cleared the crossroads. Then there was a terrible explosion. The green racer had hit something that had suddenly sailed into the gap. It was the giant tank droid. It carried on as if nothing had happened, but left a pile of smouldering wreckage where the green racer had been.

   Billy and Max flew through the crossroads and along the straight without any further incident. The bottom curve was also free of any ambushes or booby traps, and soon they flashed past the Imperial Box and Billy heard his father cheering him on. They had completed one circuit of the course. As they started the second circuit they found themselves flying through the crushed and battered remains of droids and riders.

   "It's the Demolition round!" yelled Max. Chizwick had warned them about the Demolition round. During the final circuit each team was free to stop the other racers in any way possible, except blasters.

Billy gritted his teeth. The giant droid was ahead and was once again driving the other racers into the Pillars of stone. Within seconds Billy and Max were behind it, flying over broken columns, shattered droids, and wounded riders.

The tank-droid moved to the left to crush a small red droid ridden by an octopus.

Seeing his chance, Max shot forward. The killer whale screeched when it saw what was happening, and its droid shifted to the right, but too slowly to stop Billy and Max. They were through, and the little red droid had escaped as well!

Billy waved to the alien riding the red droid. The octopus raised two of its two front tentacles as if to wave back and suddenly a jet of black ink shot out from between them, covering Max and Billy in a blinding black goo!    

   "Max!" cried Billy. "I can't see!"

Suddenly they were hit by something.

"What was that?" Billy knew they hadn't hit a pillar, because they were still alive.

He rubbed desperately at his eyes. They were streaming with tears and stinging like mad.

They were hit again and Billy saw a blur of red pass to his right as they scrapped by a pillar. It was the octopus!  

"Max can you see!" Billy didn't wait for an answer, but instead spat on his sleeve and wiped at where the little droid's eyes should be.

"Max, can you see?" he repeated, and was answered by a wail of terror and a sudden, bone-jarring swerve to the right.

They just missed a column that had been directly ahead of them - but the octopus hadn't been so lucky. He had started a third charge at Max and clipped the Pillar.

Billy looked back as the red droid bounced off two more pillars like it was in some deadly pinball game - then the giant droid slammed into it and it was gone.

They raced forwards and soon were with the main body of droids. There were about twenty racers left, each involved in desperate, individual battles.

Max gave them all a wide berth, zigzagging his way to the front, until they were behind General Blott and Rex.

The General kept ramming Rex from behind, while his Gargoyles flapped and screeched insults at Chizwick (who still had his eyes closed). It seemed rather half-hearted to Billy, compared to the vicious fights he had just passed. All Rex had to do was stay in front to win, and Blott wasn't making that too difficult.

Then Billy noticed that the fanged Gargoyle had a ball of grey material in its hand. The Gargoyle began kneading it, and rolling it between its palms.

Suddenly, the gooey substance lit up like the sun and the Gargoyle launched itself into the air, flying forwards to Rex and Chizwick on its golden wings.

The forest of pillars ended and the dark mouth of the tunnel lay just ahead.

Blott slammed into Rex once again, and at the same time, the Gargoyle slapped the glowing material onto Chizwick's back. The Vizier hadn't noticed - and suddenly Billy knew what Blott was planning!

Billy opened his mouth, to shout directions to Max, but there was no need, as Max had seen it too. He burst past Blott and up to Chizwick and Rex, just as they flew into the tunnel.

"Chizwick!" cried Billy. "There's something on your back! It's glowing! You've got to turn around!"

"Go away!" answered Chizwick's terrified voice. "You're only trying to trick us!"

Rex began to growl, and then Billy heard a fizz from the tunnel ceiling.

"Hit them Max!" he cried, and the Little droid slammed into Rex's side, sending the bright patch on Chizwick's back careering to the left of the tunnel, while they bounced to the right.

Something shot between them with a whoosh, slicing the air where Chizwick had been. 

Rex began to roar and the patch of light began weaving around in the dark, hunting for them. Another fizz came and a needle shot out, but luckily failed to connect with its darting target. But Billy knew that at any second another needle would find its mark.

He waited for as long as he could, for the patch of light to move into reach, then he grabbed at it!

Chizwick screamed with fright and Rex surged forward. The sticky patch came off in Billy's hand. Then there was an angry screech from above and suddenly small hands were tearing at Billy's hair and punching at his head. It was the Gargoyle! From the glow in his hand Billy could see its fangs snapping and slashing closer and closer with every second.

Without thinking, Billy tried to push it away. Suddenly the patch came away in his hand and the Gargoyle was sent spinning into the darkness, its progress lit by the sticky patch of light attached to its head. It let out a muffled scream and an answer came from the darkness behind. Then there was a fizz; and then the terrible screech of metal piercing metal - and Billy could see that the patch of light was no longer moving.

Suddenly there was terrible, haunting cry echoing behind them and then they were out in the light. Rex and Chizwick were a long way ahead, but they could still catch them. 

"Come on Max!" cried Billy, "We can do it! We can win this!" The little droid's anti-gravity units whistled in response and they shot forward like a bullet. They tore through the crossroads and into the bottom curve. As they came out of the curve they caught up with Rex and Chizwick, passing them like they were standing still.

"We're going to do it!" cried Billy, as they shot along the final straight.

The finishing line was just a few hundred metres ahead. There was nothing that could to stop them!

Billy's stomach rumbled and he suddenly felt incredibly sick.

"Faster!" he cried.

His stomach rumbled again, and a thick, layer of fat burst out around his middle. Then his legs rumbled.

"Faster Max!"

Billy's thighs ballooned and the little droid's antigravity units whined alarmingly. Billy's feet rumbled, then his arms and hands, and finally his head; and within seconds he was twice as big as he normally was - and twice as heavy. At that point Max's power pill gave out, and they dropped like a stone!  

Billy and Max both screamed. They were going far too fast, and were going to hit hard.   

"I am a Space Commander and I am not afraid!" whimpered Billy. And as the floor rushed up to meet them he wished more than anything that Gawain was beside him.

Then he felt Max shudder and found they were no longer falling. He looked down. Some kind of arm was clamped to Max's float-plate. He followed the arm back and gasped. It was Rex!

They crossed the finishing line and Rex gently placed Max on the ground. Half the crowd were cheering, and half were booing.

Billy slid off Max's shoulders and rolled onto his back like some odd, shell-less turtle, while the Empress, Derek, and Lizzie made their way down from the Imperial Box.

"What is the meaning of this?" asked the Empress, rapping her fist on Rex's chest. "You're supposed to destroy your opponents, not help them across the blooming line! And as for you Chizwick..."

Billy looked up, totally confused as to why Rex and Chizwick had helped them. But as the little Vizier started apologising to the Empress, Billy could see that he was examining something between his fingers. A small ball of glowing putty.

Derek and Lizzie rushed over to Billy.

"Billy! What on earth has happened to you?" 

Billy struggled to open his chubby lips. It was like talking with a pair of mattresses.

"A...a...p-ill."

"A pill!" roared his father. "Are you mad! What on Earth made you take something like that?" 

Billy blinked away fatty tears and caught a glimpse of his sister's worried face. Somehow he knew her words about him being a blob were now echoing around her own head.

"We w-won though. Max wo't be...melt'd don."

He rolled himself over onto his stomach and forced his huge head up.

"Max? Max! We...won!"

         

 

 

- CHAPTER ELEVEN -

Friends and Enemies

 

For the next week, Billy and Max were confined to their little cabin aboard the Imperial yacht. But they never had a chance to be bored, as Ambassadors and well-wishers visited every day; and they were given so many prizes and awards that Billy would have been in danger of getting a big head (if he hadn't one already!). The only person who didn't visit, however, was Lizzie. At first Billy wondered if she blamed herself for him taking the pill, but it turned out she was just too busy having fun with the Empress to bother.

During the hours when there weren't any visitors Billy was prodded and tested like some bloated lab rat. Max was given a thorough inspection as well; and it turned out that he needed a complete overhaul as most of his circuits had been damaged by the strain of the race. Chizwick issued orders for a search of all the museums for Max 450 parts. The Empress went on about it being a complete waste of money but even Rex had growled in agreement. 

Billy's father visited every day, watching quietly while doctors fussed around his slowly deflating son. At first he couldn't decide whether he was furious with him for doing such a stupid thing as taking a strange pill, or glad that no serious harm had been done.

After a few days Billy was able to talk properly and he told his father about General Blott's attack on Chizwick and Rex. It was then that they learned Blott had gone straight to his battle cruiser after the race, and no one had seen him since.

Finally, the doctors told Billy and Max they could leave their cabin. Billy had shrunk back down to normal size but the engineers warned Max not to overexert himself, as they still hadn't found parts for him.

The day they were released turned out to be the Empress's birthday (and it wasn't long before they both wished they were back in their cabin). Chizwick had reminded them of Greiogar's prophecy and given Billy an itchy black suit to wear, while Max had been grabbed by Blott's droids and sprayed from head to float-plate with black paint. There were no picnics planned. These had been cancelled for the day. And Chizwick told them, that for their own good they should mooch around as if someone had died (or else they certainly would!).

It turned out that Lizzie was having an even worse day than her brother. It had started going wrong when she'd tried to talk to the Empress about the stupid black dress Chizwick had given her to wear. She had breezed up to her as normal, a broad smile forming on her face, when all of a sudden, the Empress had screamed, and slapped her, and started raving about the prophecy.

After that the day got progressively worse for Lizzie. Breakfast was terrible, with everyone looking depressed. She had grown used to seeing her father that way but even the food looked miserable. Lunch was so bad the cutlery started crying, and by teatime she felt like screaming. The Empress wouldn't talk to her. Neither would Chizwick or Max, or the Turnip, in his stupid black dungarees. That only left one person.

   "Hi Billy," said Lizzie, guiding her chair over to her brother. He looked up briefly from his bowl of tomato soup. It was black like everything else on the table, but tasted just the same.

   "What do you want?" he said coldly.

   "Just wondering how you are."

   "What do you care?"

   Lizzie moved her chair closer. "You're annoyed because of what I said before the race, and I know I should have visited you but the doctors told me you were fine. And the Empress wanted me to go with her to all these amazing planets! Billy, I couldn't say no and..."    

"She doesn't seem to want you now," snorted Billy. "Nobody does! Nobody in the whole universe!"

Lizzie looked down, and seemed to crumple. She had been about to tell him the real reason why she'd been spending time with the Empress. That she'd persuaded her not to have Billy executed, or have Max melted down – even if they had lost the race.

Billy thought she was going to cry and he suddenly felt terrible. He was about to say he was sorry, when she looked up at him, a fierce, hard expression on her face.

"Maybe today the Empress doesn't want to know me...but just you wait till tomorrow!"

Lizzie guided her chair back to her space at the table and was met by a withering glare from the Empress. She suddenly felt more alone than she'd ever done in her life. The Empress hated her, her father hated her, and now her brother hated her.

As if sensing her mood, her chair swept her to her cabin. It settled itself next to the window and Lizzie found herself gazing out at the cold space beyond. She had decided that Billy would pay for his betrayal and of course so would the her father; but it would have to wait until things got back to normal. The whole day had been ruined by the stupid prophecy. She found herself thinking about the stupid rule that no one was able to laugh and found herself doing just that.

"What a joke!" she said, giggling to herself. "Nothing is going to happen. Nothing at all."

 

 

 

- CHAPTER TWELVE -

The Wrong Word

 

That night, Billy woke up in a cold sweat. He had been dreaming about the corridor - about monsters living behind the walls.

Max unhooked his thumb from the charging station in the corner of their cabin and floated over to his friend.

"What's wrong Billy?"

Billy pulled the covers tight under his chin. "Nothing. Just a stupid dream."

"Would you like me to sit with you?" asked Max. "I can finish my recharge tomorrow."

Billy nodded and soon his eyelids grew heavy. Somehow he knew the nightmare wouldn't trouble him any more that night; but he also knew, with the same certainty, that it would come again soon.

*

The next morning everything was back to normal. The Empress was her usual self, laughing at everything Lizzie said, and more than happy to follow any of her suggestions; so when Lizzie suggested that they hold a banquet to celebrate her birthday properly, the Empress jumped up and clapped her hands.

"Why not? It's no longer my birthday, so why can't I celebrate it? Chizwick. Return to the planet and arrange the best, most extravagant banquet the galaxy has ever known!"

She turned her ring and the door appeared before her.

"You can take the corridor. It'll be quicker."

   Chizwick touched his ring and opened the door.     

   "I shall arrange for it to be held in the Palace Stateroom this afternoon."

   He bowed to the Empress and stepped into the corridor, his mind completely absorbed with the plans for the banquet. The door clicked shut, and an odd thought struck him. No one had ever been in the corridor alone before. For some reason, this made him feel frightened. Very frightened.

Suddenly laughter echoed along the empty passageway.

"This is ridiculous," he said, chuckling to himself. "You've been listening to too many of Billy's nightmares!"

He tapped the panel next to him. It was solid wood. There was nothing in the least bit frightening about it. And anyway, he told himself, as he started to run - the other door was just a few metres ahead...

*

When the banquet was ready, Max flew them down to the planet in a shuttle. As soon as they landed they took a platform over to one of the lakes in the Stateroom. As they flew nearer they saw rows of tables, hundreds of metres long, heaped high with food. Seated around them were twenty two thousand Ambassadors, all waiting for permission to eat.

"Isn't this fun!" laughed the Empress. 

   They zipped up a huge staircase that rose unsupported from the ground and stopped at the top, beside a table brimming with strange and exotic looking dishes of food.

   Chizwick was waiting at the table. And so was General Blott. He glared at Billy and Max and the single, horned Gargoyle on his right shoulder hissed and spat at them.

"So you finally decided to show your face," giggled the Empress. "You're looking a bit lopsided!"

"I'm... well...majesty," stuttered the Gargoyle, while the General's face grew more and more frustrated. 

"I'm sure you're only telling me half the story!" sniggered the Empress.

She turned to her Vizier. "Chizwick. You've outdone yourself! This is the best party I have ever had!"

"You will never have a better one," said Chizwick curtly, but the Empress hadn't noticed. She was too busy sniffing and tasting all of the dishes.

After they had all eaten their fill, Lizzie put her plan into action.

"Your Majesty," she said. "I hope you don't mind, but I've arranged some entertainment for you."

"Entertainment?" repeated the Empress excitedly. "What's that?"

"It's called a firework display. But before it starts. We need to dim the lights."

In an instant the Empress was on her feet.

"Listen everyone! Ambassador Lizzie has arranged a far-wok display. Whatever that is. Now, whoever is in charge of the lights turn them off!"

The vast room was plunged into darkness, and far below, the droids that Lizzie had been coaching all morning lit the fuses of the fireworks they had made.

Suddenly the sky burst into a thousand different colours as rockets and mortars shot into the air. Lizzie sat grinning in the dark, listening to the gasps and applause. But the best bit was yet to come. When the sky would be lit up with the words: 'Time for the Turnip and Little Weed to go home!' The lights would then come on, and they'd find a shuttle hovering above them, ready to take them back to Earth.   

She nudged the Empress in the dark. 

"Just watch this your Majesty!"

   The sky erupted into light again and, as if by magic, letters formed in the air. Everyone gasped as they appeared one by one, spelling a single, terrible word:

   'Greiogar!"  

"Is this some kind of joke?" asked the Empress. Chizwick. Where are you?"

Suddenly callous laughter echoed all around the dim hall.

The Empress screamed and blaster bolts shot out from where Rex and Blott had been hovering.

Lizzie heard her father tell them to get down and for once she didn't argue with him. She ducked under the table which turned out to be extremely crowded, as all the more intelligent food had done the same.

"Billy?" whispered Lizzie.

"I'm over here with Max!" came the reply.

"What's going on?"

"I think that was Greiogar," said Max.

"Where's dad?"

But there was no answer. Only the sound of panic from far below.

The lights came on again. Lizzie poked her head out from under the table and her heart almost stopped.

The Empress was looking about wildly, clutching her right hand. Chizwick was lying on the floor, struggling to get to his feet, and Rex and General Blott were pointing their blasters directly at her father!

"What's going on?" asked Lizzie frantically.

The Empress pointed a long trembling finger at Derek Crumble.

"This creature tried to grab my ring, he nearly broke my arm! Rex!"

Everyone heard the unmistakable sound of blasters being charged.

"Wait!" cried Lizzie desperately. "He belongs to me! You just can't blast him! At least hear what he has to say!"

   "Very well," said the Empress. "Do not destroy him – yet."

Lizzie walked over to her father. She wanted to tell the Empress who he really was and that he wouldn't hurt a fly, (apart from boring it to death); but she guessed that another surprise might get them all killed.

"Well Turnip?" she began, as calmly as possible. "Did you attack the Empress?"

Derek looked at his daughter and shook his head. "No Lizzie, I was trying to save her. I saw someone lunge at her. They had a knife."

"Ridiculous!" said Chizwick.

With a sweeping gesture he picked up his fez and placed it firmly on his head. "The alien pushed me to the floor on his way towards the Empress."

"How do you know it was him?" asked Billy. "It was pitch black."

"One of Blott's blaster bolts lit him up." said Chizwick smugly.

"But General Blott only started firing after the Empress screamed," said Billy.

On hearing this, the Gargoyle jumped down from Blott's shoulder, and rushed at Billy, raking the air with its talons.

"Stop that Blott!" roared the Empress.

She turned to Derek. "I will deal with you later. In the meantime, let's see what other mischief has been caused today!"

The Empress led them down the steps and when they reached the bottom, even she was shocked. Tables were upturned. Hoards of chairs were running about in panic. And all around them lay thousands of bodies of all shapes and sizes. But it was the noise that was the worst thing. Screeches and rumbles and stuttering chirps, and a myriad other alien voices, crying out in pain and fear.

   The Empress gave orders for medical droids to tend to the injured ambassadors and soon the sky was swarming with medical shuttles.

A floating platform carrying eight Palace droids landed next to them, and General Blott shoved Derek onto it.

"What's going to happen to dad?" asked Billy anxiously.

An evil grin spread across Blott's face. "I...interrogate... "

"I think it would be better if I interrogated the prisoner!" interrupted Chizwick. 

   Blott looked pleadingly at the Empress. "But...but..."

"Perhaps you're right," said the Empress. "The General doesn't seem quite himself."

"Then...permission I...retire...Majesty!"  growled the gargoyle with barely concealed fury, as Blott rose into the sky, his antigravity units flaring angrily.

Billy and Lizzie watched helplessly as Chizwick and their father were whisked away next. Then another platform landed to carry the rest of them away. They were about to leave when the Empress noticed that Max had still not joined them.

   "Get on!" she roared.

   "S-sorry your Majesty," said Max nervously. "I-I've just remembered...I've forgotten something."

The Empress stomped impatiently, making the platform ring like a huge bell; but much to Billy's dismay, Max zipped back up the stairs. He came back down a minute later and just as he reached the bottom step, the Empress pointed her finger at him.

"Destroy him Rex!"

Before anyone could do or say anything, Rex raised his arms and let fly two blaster bolts that rushed towards Max, hitting him in a blinding flash!

"What! That's impossible! I said destroy him!"

A wisp of smoke rose from where Max's antenna had been, but apart from that he was unharmed.

The Empress looked first to Rex and then back to Max, her face full of fury.

"You're a very lucky little droid," she fumed. "But next time, I'll make sure he finishes the job!"   

 

 

- CHAPTER THIRTEEN -

The Ambassador from Earth has been Grounded!

 

For the first time since they had arrived, Lizzie and Billy didn't stay in the familiar comfort of the Imperial yacht. Instead they were each given a room in the vast Imperial Palace, and politely told not to leave.

   "We've got to rescue dad!" said Billy to Max, as soon as the door slid shut.

   The little droid zipped past him, stopped in the centre of the room, and began to spin slowly around, whistling to himself.

   "Did you hear me Max?" said Billy, who had stated to wonder if he was in some kind of shock from losing his antenna.  

   Max raised his eyes and carried on whistling.

   "On second thoughts," said Billy, realising that the room might be bugged, "I think the best thing to do is stay here."   

   He went to move towards Max but a warning glance kept him rooted to the spot. Max obviously wanted him to stay still. Billy did his best but he'd already raised his foot to step forward, and after a few minutes he began to feel dizzy. He began to wobble, and knew that any second he would fall.

   Finally Max nodded his head. "It's ok. You can move now."  

   Billy gratefully put his foot down.   

   "What's going on?"    

   "Bugs," said Max, confirming his suspicions. "Seventeen. It took me a while to disable them all." A panel in the side of his head slid open and Max reached in and pulled out a round, grey object that was covered in jewels and tiny blinking lights.

"Um..." said Billy, "what's that?"

   "This is my spare brain."

He noticed Billy's expression and smiled. "All droids have two brains," he explained, "in case one gets damaged, or breaks down; but don't worry. I'm perfectly able to get by on one."

   He called a table over and placed the brain on the top.

"I've tuned it into the bug's video relays and it will keep showing them the last few minutes again and again."

   "A video loop!" said Billy in admiration. "I saw one like it in 'Space Commander and the Prisoner of the Asteroids'!"

   Max winked. "One of my favourite episodes. It can record as well. During the banquet I took it out and hid it on the table. I had a feeling something was going to happen."

   "That's why you went back!" said Billy, nodding in admiration. "Did it see anything?"

   "Let's find out."

Max touched one of the jewels and a tiny light shone out and projected a hologram of the banquet onto the tabletop. It was eerie watching the meal, knowing what was going to happen. Billy could see himself glaring occasionally at his sister while she talked with the Empress. Then the scene grew suddenly dark, and tiny fireworks fizzed in the air. They outlined the Empress as she stood up. 

   "Is this some kind of joke?" she said, her voice sounding tiny and unreal. "Chizwick. Where are you?"

Then they heard the laughter, as a hand holding a knife rose up behind her. 

"It's Blott's Gargoyle!" said Billy. "It's must be!"

The attacker's silhouette appeared beside the Empress. But much to Billy's surprise, it didn't have horns and wings. Instead it was wearing some sort of hat. Billy gasped. It looked like a fez - a fez, with a big feather stuck in it!

*

Lizzie paced up and down in the centre of her room, feeling more than ever like a caged animal. She had travelled across the Galaxy, across thousands of light years, and found herself, basically, grounded! Only this time, there was more at stake than her freedom. She wished that she'd never got Billy to make the radio for her birthday, and that her father was mowing next door's lawn. He would be the same boring Turnip that had made her life a misery, but at least he would be safe.

On a sudden impulse, Lizzie took off her shoulder bag and took out the videocassette she had carried all the way from Earth. It would soon be the only memory she had of her father, unless she did something quickly.

She heard the swish of the door opening, thrust the cassette back into her bag and turned around. Chizwick was standing alone in the room. He looked deadly serious.

"Your father has been found guilty of attacking the Empress and will be disintegrated tomorrow morning."

"I don't think so," said Lizzie. "The Empress won't let it happen. Not if I say so."

"Is that right?" said Chizwick. "You think because you've been of some amusement to the Empress, he won't be punished. Especially after you've been so cruel to him?"

"But he's my father," said Lizzie desperately. "He'd never hurt anyone!" 

   "Nevertheless he will die tomorrow," said Chizwick. "Unless you help me. You see, there is something the Empress has, that I need."

   "What?"

   Chizwick swept up to her. His eyes were bulging. They seemed dead - like shark's eyes.

   "Her ring," he said, chillingly. "I want the ring that creates the corridor." 

 

 

  

- CHAPTER FOURTEeN -

The Deception

 

The door slid open with a barely perceptible swish and Lizzie stepped into the Empress's private bedchamber. The entry code that Chizwick had given her had worked, just as it had done for the seventeen other doors she had gotten through. As instructed, she put on the infrared glasses he had given her, and the empty space between herself and the Empress's bed was instantly criss-crossed by dozens of deadly laser beams.

She stepped over the first beam then ducked down under the point where two beams crossed. Chizwick had explained everything in perfect detail; including the fact that he and all of the Palace droids carried an un-removable proximity transmitter, and that only she could get near to the Empress, without setting off every alarm in the Palace. 

   She stepped over the last beam. There was nothing now between her and the Empress – apart from Rex. But just as Chizwick had promised, the giant droid was recharging himself, his sensors switched off.

Lizzie edged past Rex and took out the hypo-gun Chizwick had given her. He had explained that the Empress had to be drugged before she took off her ring. Otherwise she would wake up.

   Lizzie crept towards the bed and pointed the hypo-gun at the Empress's neck. She would fire it, take the ring, and go to Chizwick's office, where her father and Billy would be waiting - and they would all be allowed to go home. All she had to do was press the button.

The gun wavered. Chizwick had been truthful up to this point, but the way he'd giggled when he'd handed her the gun had made her shiver.

She decided she had to test the gun first. Her gaze fell on the chair beside the Empress's bed. She crept over to it and felt the padded seat. The chair shifted under her hand. She wondered if it was it alive. And if it was and the hypo-gun was poisoned as she suspected it was, did she have the right to kill it just to find out?

The Empress suddenly shouted out in her sleep and Lizzie yelped. She looked down. The Hypo-gun had gone off. A tiny dart had hit the chair and blackness immediately began to form around it. It spread out quickly, and as it grew, Lizzie felt a tide of horror rise inside her. There was a crack and one of the legs broke off. The chair toppled over. It hit the floor and smashed into dust.

Lizzie wanted to scream, but she knew she couldn't. Somehow, without thinking she made it past the laser beams and out of the room. Then she started to run blindly through the palace. Doors opened for her, leading her back to Chiswick's office; but she never noticed them – or the two figures that were following her. One of them thin and wiry, and the other very, very large.  

 

  

 

- CHAPTER FIFTEEN -

The Corridor of Doom

 

Lizzie burst into Chizwick's office. He was waiting there alone. There was no sign of her father.  

   "Where's dad?" she asked anxiously "You said he would be waiting for me!"

Her eyes darted around the room. There was no other entrance. Only a single window presenting a gloomy night time view of the rest of the Palace.

"Did you get it?" hissed Chizwick, ignoring her. "Did you drug the Empress and did you take the ring?"

"Yes," said Lizzie. It's in my pocket. "But I won't let you have it till I've seen my dad?"

Chizwick let out a tiny giggle. "Very well!"

He pressed a button on his desk. A hole in the floor opened and Derek Crumble rose up on a platform, accompanied by two stocky Palace droids.

Lizzie rushed to him. He looked tired, but apart from that he seemed unhurt.

"Now give me the ring!" hissed Chizwick.

"Why do you want it so much?" asked Lizzie. "Is it really worth killing the Empress for?"

"What?" asked Derek. "The Empress isn't dead?"

Chizwick giggled again. "I'm afraid she is," he said. "And your lovely daughter is the one who killed her!"

Derek looked down in horror at his daughter's face, instantly recognising the innocent look she always used when she had something to hide.

"I knew I should have given more time for the poison to work," continued Chizwick. "No doubt you glanced back at the Empress before you left the room and found her looking...how can I put it nicely? Dead."

"Something like that," said Lizzie, happy to let Chizwick carry on talking. "But why do you want the ring?"

"Why?" repeated Chizwick. "Because it's unique! It's the only one in the whole universe! The Empress would never have parted with it while she was still alive. It really was a pity to kill her. The others who live in the corridor could have had fun with her."

"Others?" said Derek.

"Yes!" giggled Chizwick. "Lots of them. Lots and lots..."

"Of what?"

Chizwick turned to the figure that had just stepped into the room. His mouth dropped open and he let out a strangled gasp.

The Empress walked up to him. "You said lots and lots. Lots and lots of what?"

Rex sailed through the doorway and joined her as a dollop of drool dribbled down Chizwick's chin.

"Bu-bu-yo-your-de-de..."

"It will be lots and lots of pain unless you begin making sense!" snapped the Empress. 

Chizwick gulped and waved a trembling finger in the direction of Lizzie.

"Your Majesty!" he shrieked. "Sh-she broke into your room!"

"Yes I know that! She blooming well poisoned my favourite chair!"

"She what? So she hasn't got the..."

Chizwick glanced at the Empress's right hand, then he turned back to Lizzie, his eyes burning with fury.

"The what?" asked the Empress. "Really Chizwick, you are becoming increasingly infuriating."

As if to emphasise her annoyance, Rex began to growl.

Suddenly Billy and Max ran into the room. "Empress, you've got to listen!" began Billy. "I know who attacked you!"

"Don't listen to him!" shouted Chizwick. Then Lizzie joined in, yelling with all her might, while Rex's growl grew louder and louder.

"SHUT-UUUUPPP!!!"

Everyone immediately shut up and looked at the Empress, who was shaking with rage.

"Now listen," she said, "I am in a very, very bad mood! My party was ruined; my Ambassadors killed; Greiogar is back; Blott has turned into a half-wit - and to top it all just when I need him the most, Chizwick has gone gaga on me!"

She took a deep breath. "I have decided that one of you will be disintegrated in the next few minutes. It is up to each of you to convince me that you are not the one!" 

"It's a conspiracy!" blurted Chizwick. "They're all in it together. The girl should be blasted on the spot. They all should be!" 

He hopped over to one of the Palace droids. "Blast them!" he hissed. "Blast the conspirators!"

The droid raised its arm and was instantly vaporised by Rex.

"I don't want anyone blasted yet!" said the Empress firmly. "Not until I find out exactly what's going on!"

Chizwick looked around the room at Lizzie, Billy, Derek, and Max, all eager to speak to the Empress.

"Your Majesty!" he began. "She isn't even a proper Ambassador! She was sent here by mistake. She doesn't even live in a Palace!"

The Empress saw the look of alarm that flashed across Lizzie's face.

"Is this true?"

"But Empress, Chizwick tried to..."

"Rex!" screeched the Empress. "Destroy the prisoner the next time someone fails to answer my questions!"

Rex turned to face Derek and raised his blasters.

Chizwick smiled. "There is a simple way to prove who she really is. We can use the corridor to go to Earth."       

"Do you object to that?" asked the Empress, preparing to signal to Rex.

Lizzie's mind raced ahead. "Um...not at all. We can go to Buckingham Palace. That's where we live." 

Billy opened his mouth and let out a squeal as Lizzie trod on his toe.

"You have something to add?" asked the Empress.

   "No," said Billy. "Except...except that we really do live there."

"Is this true droid?"

Lizzie gulped. She had forgotten about Max.

"They..." began Max. "They..."

Billy thought he heard a tinkling sound from inside Max's head - as if something had broken.

"They do your Majesty," said Max. "They all live in Buckingham Palace."

"Well that's settled then," said the Empress. "Everyone knows that a Max 450 is too stupid to lie. Chizwick! We are going to Buckingham palace and we shall see exactly who will be disintegrated!"

She pressed her ring and the door appeared.

Chizwick touched some gems on his own ring and opened the door.

"After you," he said, a smirk rippling across his face.

The Empress swept into the corridor, with Rex following at her heels. Lizzie stepped through next, planning what she'd say when they appeared at Buckingham palace. She looked back briefly to check that Billy and her father were following. But something was wrong. Billy had stopped in the doorway.

"What are you doing?" hissed Lizzie. "Hurry up or you'll ruin it!"

But Billy never heard her. Instead he was remembering his dream. He saw Chizwick closing the door. The corridor with them all in it. The walls falling away - and the monsters. They were hiding behind the walls!

"What is it now!" screeched the Empress, who had stopped halfway along the corridor and was looking back, a furious expression on her face.

"It's...it's..." began Billy.

"It's a trap!" shouted his father. "It's a trap Lizzie! Get out of there!"

Lizzie stood rooted to the spot. The Turnip was ruining it again. But this time he'd get them all killed!

"I don't believe you!" she yelled. "I'm trying to save you, you stupid, stupid..."

But all of a sudden her father and Billy were gone. Chizwick had pushed them out of the way.

He leered at Lizzie through the doorway and shouted: "Master, I've brought them to you! They are yours!"

And then Lizzie, the Empress and Rex were staring back at the closed door that had been slammed shut by Chiswick – and then that too was gone. 

A deathly silence filled the corridor. Lizzie's heart skipped a beat. It had suddenly grown very cold.

"Chizwick?"

The Empress strode back past Lizzie to where the door had been. She was so full of fury she hadn't noticed the drop in temperature; or that the lights along the corridor were blinking off, one by one. 

"Chizwick!" she bellowed. "I've had just about enough of this. Chizwick! Do you hear me?"

Suddenly, all around them came the sound of chattering. 

"What's that?" asked the Empress. "And why is it so cold?" 

"I don't know," said Lizzie. "But I have a very bad feeling about..."

She gasped, unable to finish the sentence. All she could do was point with a shaking finger at what she had seen.

A part of the wall near the Empress's head had suddenly begun to ripple as if it was made of water. Something broke through the surface. A long, thin, black tentacle. It writhed and whipped the air blindly, as if fishing for something. More tentacles grew out from the wall and suddenly the rest of the creature's body appeared, squeezing through the wall with a pop. A frightful looking yellow eye opened and narrowed to a slit as suddenly its tentacles shot towards the Empress.

Rex vaporised the creature before it could reach her, but not before it had sent out a horrific screech that chilled Lizzie's bones. It seemed to be saying; 'I've found them!'

The chattering suddenly stopped. The only sound came from Rex, who was growling like mad.

Something dark dropped down from the ceiling and landed with a thud on the floor. It grew six legs and started crawling towards them, sticking out a long thin tongue as it went.  

Rex blasted it but dozens more creatures dropped down to take its place. Soon the whole corridor was full of monsters. All of them slithering and crawling towards them.  

"What can we do?" cried the Empress, looking about helplessly. Then her eyes opened wide and she started to run.

"Of course! The door! We've got to get to the other door!" 

The words jolted Lizzie into action and she started running after the Empress; dodging and ducking as feelers and claws tried to snatch at her. She yelled with fright as something grabbed her from behind and lifted her from the floor. But it was only Rex. An arm had grown out of his chest and plucked her from the ground (which was just as well, as it was now covered by hundreds of writhing creatures). Rex scooped the Empress up next. She was shivering with fear.

"One of them touched me!" she said feebly. "A fat little creature with a huge mouth. For a second it was inside my head and I was starving! I would have torn you apart and eaten you raw!"

There was a sudden snarl, and the floor behind them rose up as a huge tentacle pushed its way through the other creatures. It stretched towards them, guided by a giant red burning eye.

The corridor was suddenly plunged into darkness - but the eye remained, glowing like an angry red sun rising behind them. It was staring at the Empress.      

"Rex, we've got to get out of here right now!" she screamed. "Come on you bucket of bolts! Blast them! Blast them all to bits!" 

Rex floated forward, firing lightning bolts into the blackness. Illuminating the corridor with a stuttering glow that made everything move in slow motion. Monsters with leathery wings flickered in and out of the darkness, exploding like firecrackers as they were blown apart. Rex's arms were two giant pulsing searchlights, sending out bolts of energy in every direction – but there were just too many monsters. Lizzie knew it was hopeless. There was no way that they could reach the other door!

 

 

- CHAPTER SIXteen -

The Fall Guys

 

 

Derek Crumble grabbed Chizwick and spun him around.

"Why did you do that? Open the door and bring my daughter back! Bring her back right now! Do you hear me?"

The door vanished and Chizwick giggled. Only he wasn't quite Chizwick anymore. He looked the same. He hadn't grown another head, or a pair of horns; but Derek could tell he was someone, or rather something else.

"You won't want your daughter back," he snarled, "Not after she's been in the corridor."

"What do you mean?" asked Billy, suddenly feeling very afraid.

Chizwick ducked out from Derek's grip and ran over to the remaining Palace droid.

"Destroy them."

The droid's arm fizzed as it charged its blaster and promptly disappeared in a blinding flash. Max had drawn his blaster and blown the droid's arm off.

"What!" roared Chizwick. "A Max 450 can't shoot another droid!"

"I know!" squeaked Max.

Chizwick dived behind his desk and reached up and pressed a button.

"General Blott to my office immediately! The Earthlings have killed the Empress!"

The damaged droid's head suddenly exploded and the body that was left lost all control. It started spinning wildly about; firing bolts from its remaining arm in all directions. There was a sudden explosion as one of the blasts shattered the window.

Max whizzed over to his friends through the hail of fire.

"Quick!" he cried. "Blott will be here in seconds!"

He grabbed them and dragged them towards the window.

   Billy's feet crunched on the broken glass as he tried to struggle free. He looked down and felt sick. They were thousands of metres up. He could see the tower opposite, disappearing down into the never-ending gloom.

"I can't do it Max!" he cried. "I'm scared of heigh-t-s!"

Billy's last word turned into a scream as Max dragged him and his father through the window. At the same time General Blott burst into the office, knocking the damaged droid aside as if it were made of paper. He rushed to the window and all four of his immense blasters began firing down after them. Sending bolts of energy searing into the blackness. For a full minute he continued, spitting out white-hot hate, until he finally stopped - when he could no longer hear the sound of Billy's scream.  

They seemed to fall forever, streaking past hundreds and thousands of bright windows; clinging to each other like three leaves in a storm. After a time the lighted windows flickered by less and less frequently, looking dirtier and dimmer as they whizzed by. Then the last window went past in a yellow smear and was gone – and still they kept on falling; only now there was nothing to mark their fall, only blackness and the brief flash of blaster bolts fired from above.

One shot whizzed past Billy's head, singeing his hair. He followed its path as it raced ahead of them into the darkness, growing dimmer and dimmer until it finally disappeared. Billy felt a pain in his head and his ears popped, and he began to wonder if the planet had any surface at all. He pictured them falling right through and coming out of the other side. Another bolt shot past them and disappeared; but a few seconds later there was an explosion far below them. The bolt had hit something.

"This is it!" cried Max, his antigravity units whining above the wind.

Billy felt a tug as Max tried to slow them down. But it was not enough. Another bolt exploded twenty metres below them, revealing a jumble of pipe-work rushing towards them. Billy wished that he had the anti-gravity belt on. He could save them all. It would be as simple as thinking. And he couldn't die yet. He had to save Lizzie. He was thinking this very thought as the three of them struck the surface of Vallakye.       

 

  

- CHAPTER SEVENTeen -

The Depths of Vallakye

 

The whole world was full of stars, circling in the air. They sparkled, brilliantly at first, then they grew dimmer and dimmer till they were gone and there was nothing but blackness and pain.

Billy sat up and realised that the pain could only mean one thing - amazingly, somehow - he was still alive! He felt something gooey on his fingers. It was mud.

There was a groan beside him. It was his father.

"Billy? Where are you?"

"I'm over here," said Billy. He felt his father's hands touch his face. They were trembling.

"I'm fine dad," said Billy. "Just a bit sore. Where's Max?"

Billy got to his feet, took a few steps forward and tripped over something. It groaned.

"Max? Dad, it's Max! He's hurt!"

Derek crawled over, following his son's voice. He could just see the two lights that were Max's eyes, glowing dimly in the dark.  

"Are you damaged?"

"Very tired," came the feeble reply.

"What do you mean?" asked Billy.

"Slowing you down drained my batteries." His eyes faded out completely. "But I did it Billy. You're alive! Who says a Max 450 is useless?"

"I don't," said Billy. He bent down and lifted Max's head, remembering that he hadn't had a full recharge the night before - and it was because of him.

"We can't stay here," said Derek. "Look."

    Something was dropping down towards them. It was the huge silhouette of General Blott.

Derek got to his feet and hefted Max up, slinging him over his shoulder. 

"Leave me," croaked the little droid.

"Not a chance!" said Derek sternly. "You're the only one who knows his way around here. Anyway, you're no heavier than a sack of compost!"

Derek took hold of his son's hand and they began to run. Soon, Billy began to tire. But Derek wouldn't stop.

"Dad!" cried Billy, his legs numb. "Where are we going?"

Then he saw it, ahead of them; rising up from the mud - the wall of the opposite tower.

They reached the tower and began looking for a way in.

"Stop!" croaked Max. "A door."

Derek looked desperately at the wall. Expecting at any second to be hit in the back by a blaster bolt. It looked exactly the same as the rest of the wall, apart from a tiny window and a small round depression the size of a fingertip below it.

"Lift my hand to it!" whispered Max urgently. He touched the depression with his middle finger, and suddenly a door slid open with a clang.

Derek dragged Max and Billy inside, and as the door began to slide shut, the outside exploded with blinding blaster fire. Part of the explosion seemed to leap inside, and then thankfully the door clanged shut.

"Use my blaster!" urged Max. "Fuse the lock."

Derek took Max's blaster from its holster and blasted away the control panel on the inside of the door.

"That should hold Blott," rasped Max. "Those are asteroid proof doors. Even his blasters can't get through them."

Billy slumped down against the door, his chest heaving in and out.

"We're safe th..."

He stopped breathing. Something was glaring at him from the shadows. It crept forward into the dim light. A golden Gargoyle!

Suddenly there was a terrific crash against the door. Billy jumped up and saw General Blott's eye peering through the window. 

"You...going...die!" stuttered the Gargoyle as razors grew out from its two front paws. Its wings spread open and it leapt towards Billy like a golden dagger.

The door banged again. Blott's eye was rammed against the window, not wanting to miss any part of what was going to happen next.

Billy looked around for something to protect himself with. But it was too late. The Gargoyle was on him!

There was a blinding flash, and the Gargoyle fell to the ground with a crash - a smouldering stump was all that remained of one its wings.

The Gargoyle scrambled to its feet and snarled towards where the bolt had come from. Derek Crumble stepped out of the shadows, Max's blaster in his hand.

"Get away from my son!"

The Gargoyle stepped back. Then without warning it leapt at Derek, knocking the blaster to the floor. They tumbled into the shadows. Billy stumbled after them, but he heard his father's voice warning him away. There was more snarling. Then a clicking sound, like wires being cut. A scream rose from the dark. A haunting scream that Billy had heard before. It was silenced by a final, sharp snap!

A figure emerged into the light. Billy thought his heart was going to burst. It was his father - and in his hand was a pair of rose-clippers!

He looked at them proudly before attaching them to his tool belt.

"Who needs a plutonium powered pen when you've got these!"

Derek quickly found Max's blaster and put it back in his holster. Then he picked up Max, and he and Billy ran past the lifeless body of the Gargoyle, while behind them, the whole of the wall began to shake and buckle.

 

  

- CHAPTER EIGHTEEN -

An Intergalactic Barroom Brawl

 

They found themselves in a long dark corridor. It had a damp musty smell, and there seemed to be light fittings of some sort dotted along the ceiling, but most of them were broken. There was something else as well. Somewhere in the distance there was music. Very badly played music.  

"Do you hear that dad?" asked Billy. "We might find someone to fix Max."

They ran on, guided by the increasingly loud music. Eventually they came to a hallway where more of the lights were working, and at the end of this hallway was a door with a neon sign above it. Alien writing flashed on the sign, but unlike the writing on the anti-gravity belt, the symbols remained frustratingly unreadable.

Suddenly there was a grunt from behind them and a toad-like alien squeezed past them. It pushed the door open. The music grew louder and the toad started to grunt along to the tune.

Derek Crumble laughed out loud for the first time in days.

"What is it?" asked Billy.

His father pointed to the door. "That," he said, "is a bar. And if not mistaken, that sign says 'Karaoke night!'  

The bar was dark and smoky, and jam packed full of dangerous looking aliens with sharp claws and teeth, and vicious looking eyes that followed them around the room (one of them kept shoving Billy in the back, till he poked it with his finger). All the tables were full, apart from a single table in the middle with nobody sitting, or slithering, or floating around it. This had three normal sized chairs arranged around it and also a giant chair that looked like it had been specially made for someone very, very big.

They sat down and Derek called over a waiter-droid who had been hovering past.

"What can I get you?" asked the droid, wiping the table.

"How about a recharge for my friend here?" said Derek, pointing with his thumb to the chair beside him.

"What friend?" asked the droid.

"Hold on!" said Derek. He reached under the table and heaved Max back onto the chair he had just slid off.

The droid dropped his towel "I don't believe it! A Max 450! Why do ya wanna recharge that pile of junk?"

"Because I say so!" said Billy sternly.

The droid looked at them suspiciously. "I ain't seen you round here before. You're friends of Fangutt, right?"

As he spoke he looked over to the empty chair.

"Of course we are!" said Derek. "Now how about that recharge. And something to drink."     

"Sure. If you're Fangutt's friends!" said the droid. "What would you like? An Antearian Nova? A Galactic Spiral?"

"Two glasses of water please," said Derek.

"The strong stuff eh? One recharge and two glasses of water coming right up." 

The waiter floated away through the throng of aliens. A minute later he was back, balancing a tray holding two glasses of water and a small cube pulsating with light.

    He put the glasses on the table and tossed the cube towards Max.

"Shall I charge it to Fangutt?" he asked, looking again in the direction of the empty chair.

Derek nodded. "Yes put it on Fangutt's tab."

The droid left and Derek picked up the cube. It vibrated in his hand.

"What do I do with this?" he asked.

"Give it to me," said Billy. He grabbed it, took hold of Max's left hand, and twisted his thumb. It flipped open to reveal two prongs. He quickly thrust the prongs into the cube. It dimmed almost immediately and Max jerked into life.

"Where are we?" he asked.

"In a bar of some sort," said Derek. "We thought you'd had it."

Billy nodded, suddenly unable to talk.

"How did you get the recharge cube?" asked Max, flicking the top of his thumb back.

"They think we're friends of someone called Fangutt," said Derek. "Luckily he doesn't seem to be around.

"What does this Fangutt look like?" asked Max. He stared at the giant chair opposite. He shook his head and stared again. Had it moved?

"Don't know and don't care!" said Derek. He began to laugh. "That's the one good bit of luck we've had so far! Eh Billy?"

Billy didn't answer. He had noticed that the huge chair was moving as well. It began to creak and rock as if an invisible giant was getting up from it.

"I'd like to see this Fangutt's face when he realises we've pulled a fast one on him!" giggled Derek.

The table groaned as if an invisible giant had bent down and was leaning on it. 

"He'll be livid!" roared Derek. "Isn't that hysterical! Billy? Max? What's wrong?"

A rumble sounded in the smoke filled air above their heads. At the same time a wave of foul smelling breath washed over them.

Derek stopped laughing and looked up. It was as if an invisible giant had just opened its mouth - and growled at him. 

"Fangutt?" he asked, peering at the empty air. "I...I can explain!"

Suddenly he was sent flying across the bar. The smoke above the table rippled, and for a second Billy saw the outline of a monstrous alien with huge, crab-like claws towering above them.

"So I'm your friend am I?" rumbled the air.

Billy's eyes darted to his father, who had landed in a heap on another table.

"You s-shouldn't have done that!" he yelped. "I-I'm Space Commander Crumb-b-ble."

   "Commander who?" growled the smoke.   

"Commander Crumble!" gulped Billy. "My partner will be here s-soon and then you'll be in tr-trouble!"

   Fangutt began to laugh. "When your partner comes all he'll find is a stain on the floor!"

   Suddenly Billy saw a huge, ghostly claw rush towards him through the smoke. Then an invisible vice closed around his sides and in a flash he was lifted high above the table.

   "You're too big too eat in one bite," growled the air in front of him. "I think I'll have to cut you in two!"

     As he spoke, the pressure on Billy's ribs tightened until it was unbearable. His vision began to dim and the room began to spin. He caught sight of his father, who was still lying unmoving where he'd landed. He saw Max draw his blaster, only to be pounced upon and dragged under the table by two waiter-droids. Then the darkness closed around him.

It was the end.

  "I'd prefer it if you didn't cut my partner in half," came a voice from the darkness. It sounded familiar. Billy had heard it many times before - but only in his dreams.

   Billy forced with all his might and the room swam into view.

   A figure appeared through the smoke and walked over to the table. He was wearing a grey cloak, with a large hood that hid his head; and he was carrying a long, wooden staff!

   "I'm sorry I'm late Commander Crumble."

Billy's mouth fell open and he let out a strangled gasp.

"I'll be happy to pay for the drinks and the cube," said the mysterious figure. "And then we'll leave. We don't want any trouble. But we will fight if we have to. Now be a good invisible alien and put my partner down!"

The music that had been playing stopped, and the bar was swamped in silence. Everyone had heard the threat in the stranger's voice.

Billy felt the pressure on his ribs ease slightly and he gulped in a lung-full of air. He could sense that somehow, despite his size, Fangutt was afraid of the stranger. The air rumbled again, only this time it sounded indecisive. As if the giant was making his mind up what to do next. Then, from the back of the darkened bar, a harsh alien voice urged Fangutt on. More voices shouted their support and the invisible rumble grew more confident.

"No!" it roared. "I'm hungry!"

Billy braced himself for the snap of the claw that was holding him; and wondered if it would be the last sound he would ever hear. But the crushing pressure never came. The hooded stranger waved his hand, and suddenly Fangutt howled in pain, and dropped him.

Billy landed heavily on the table, sending a stab of pain through his bruised ribs; while above him the air shook with rage.

"Who are you!" it roared. At the same time, Billy felt a strong gust of wind and guessed that Fangutt had aimed a swipe at the hooded figure – but the stranger leapt in the air and hit Fangutt a tremendous smack with his staff.

"Since you've asked so nicely, I'll tell you. My name is Gawain!"

There was a sudden roar of pain from Fangutt. Then a sort of creaking and cracking sound; as if a tree were falling. Then two tables were abruptly flattened and Billy knew that Fangutt had toppled over, and wouldn't get up for a long while. Silence once more filled the bar. Then, with an angry roar, all the aliens charged forward to help their invisible friend.

Gawain rushed towards the mob and forced them back with his staff.

"We've got to get out of here!" he yelled. "Get up Billy!"

Billy struggled to his feet and staggered to the table where his father had landed.

"Billy?" said his father, a dazed expression on his face. "What happened?"

"We met Fangutt," said Billy. "Come on. We've got to go!"

"Hurry up!" urged Gawain. 

They stopped at Fangutt's table and Billy peered under it. "Max? Max, are you O.K? Max?"

   There was a terrific double crunch of metal on metal. Billy watched anxiously as a pair of silvery hands reached out from below and slowly a figure pulled itself up. It was Max!

"If there's one thing I hate it's bad service!" said the little droid.

Billy grinned back. "You're the best Max!"

The three of them joined Gawain.   

"This way!" he yelled, pointing towards a doorway. They burst through and found a small float-car waiting on the other side. In seconds they all clambered on, and the car shot off down the darkened corridor.

*

They drove down into the bowels of the planet; zipping through dark and dangerous looking tunnels. The lights of the float-car played across caves that were dug into the rock. Creatures skittered amidst the rubble-strewn floor, and every now and then came a growl from a darkened opening.   

"Where are we going," asked Billy. "Gawain? That is who you...?"

Billy's voice trailed off. Gawain, or whoever he was had turned off the float-car's lights, and they were now skimming along in total blackness. Billy gulped as he realised that wasn't quite true. Out of the blackness he could see hundreds of pairs of red eyes, staring hungrily at them.

Billy spoke to the darkness. He had to know. "Gawain? You are Gawain aren't you?"

"Yes," came the reply.

"I've dreamt about you, ever since I can remember. How is that...?"

Suddenly there was a hiss of air, and a doorway full of light opened in front of them. The float-car zipped into it and stopped in a small a garage-sized room. A roar came from behind but was cut off by the closing door.

Gawain leapt out of the car and went to a vid-screen next to the door. A vicious animal face appeared, with large bat-like ears and a long hairy snout full of teeth.

"The Leschi are bold tonight," he said.

He noticed the look on Derek and Billy's faces. "Don't worry. They're harmless. I think they evolved from space-rats. No-one above knows they exist."

"You live here? With them?" asked Billy.

"We both want to stay away from prying eyes," explained Gawain. "And they were down here first. I'm the one who's intruding. Still, I've a feeling that I won't be here much longer, now that you've finally arrived."

He led them through a doorway at the opposite end of the room and they came out into what appeared to be a jungle at night. Billy could make out the silhouettes of trees against a starry sky, and beautiful smells drifted by, carried along on a warm breeze.

"This is incredible!" exclaimed Derek, as he ran from plant to plant. "But I thought we were underground?"

   "We are," said Gawain. "The stars you see are a type of fluorescent lichen. A sort of moss. In fact there are two types on the cave walls. The daylight one is asleep and will be for the next five hours."

Gawain took them on a tour of the cave. It was about half a kilometre in diameter and was teeming with life. As they walked insects chirped around them, randomly at first, then a pattern emerged; a strange haunting tune that filled the night. Gawain explained that they were soul-bugs. Telepathic insects that listened to themselves through the ears of other creatures – and, as every creature was different, the song they made was always unique.

The music reminded Billy of Lizzie. It was like she had been turned into sound. There was a mischievous beat, and every now and then a surge of notes trying to escape the rest of the song. But underneath all of it was a warmth, like a strong heartbeat that would never falter. It reminded him of what had been missing since Chizwick closed the door on her and trapped her in the corridor.

The music stopped. As if the soul-bugs knew it was too painful for him to listen anymore.

Billy wiped his eyes while Gawain led his father to a clear pool, shimmering with the frosty light from above. He noticed that Max was staring intently at Gawain.

"Max? What's wrong?"

"Why doesn't he take his hood off?" came the whispered reply.

"Gawain?"

"We don't know who he is. You say you've had dreams about him, but he could be anyone under that hood."

"I..." Billy shivered and realised that Max was right. In all his dreams he had never once seen his face. He shivered again. Gawain was looking at them.

"Come on," he whispered to Max and hurried over to the pool. 

His father was still talking excitedly, as if he had fallen under some sort of spell.

"You made all of this?" he asked in awe. "But it must have taken years."

"I helped it grow," corrected Gawain. "I think the cave was waiting for me to find it, and bring it to life.

Derek nodded knowingly. "It was the same with my vegetable patch. But how long have you been working on it?"

"Three hundred years. I had to have something to do while I waited for Billy."

"Why do you keep saying you've been waiting for me?" asked Billy. He looked at his father who had suddenly grown very pale.

"Yes, I'd like to know that too."

Gawain threw some pebbles into the dark pool.

"What do you see?" he asked.

"I don't know." said Max suspiciously. "Water?"

"Ripples," said Derek.

Gawain nodded. "When I was young, my kind filled the Galaxy, much like the ripples in this pool. I am the last, but now another stone has fallen, and new waves are spreading out..."

"What's this got to do with Billy?" interrupted Derek. "And what exactly is your kind?"

Once again, Billy realised Gawain was studying him from under his hood.

"He is no ordinary boy," said Gawain ominously. "And the time has come to tell him who he really is."

 

 

 

- CHAPTER NINETEEN -

Escape from Buckingham Palace

 

 

"I wonder how they're doing?" asked the Queen as she nibbled on a toasted teacake.

"Fine," growled the President, spilling his coffee.

"Good man that Crumble!" agreed the Prime Minister, as he spooned a pile of cream onto his fifth scone.

Caroline crumble smiled at the Queen. "I'm sure that Derek has everything under control."

It was teatime at Buckingham Palace and they were in the Stateroom, seated round a big table covered in delicious looking cakes, and lots of crumbs and coffee stains.

Suddenly one of the panes of glass in the large French doors shattered, and a football bounced into the room. This was followed a few seconds later by a very sheepish looking Sergeant Pike.

"Sorry your majesty," he said. "We thought we might have a game of footy with the Americans. To kill some time. Sorry about the window." 

When he had left the way he'd came, the Queen turned to her Prime Minister.

"Where are Colonel Brown and Agent Steel?" she asked irritably.

"In the next room your Majesty," he mumbled, munching his way through his sixth scone. "Making plans in case there's an alien invasion. We thought if they worked on it together they might stop fighting." 

"Hasn't worked though," added the President. "They've been squabbling like a couple of kids all morning!"

He lifted his saucer to his lips and slurped the coffee that had been swimming around it.

"Couple of kids!" agreed the Prime Minister letting out a loud burp.

The Queen smiled weakly at Caroline Crumble. "How long have your family been gone now?" she asked.

"Two weeks and we haven't heard a peep from them," interrupted the President, dribbling coffee all over the tablecloth.

"Yes. Two whole weeks," said the Queen. "Such a long time. Wasn't your visit supposed to have ended a week ago?"

"Too right!" exclaimed the Prime Minister, spraying everyone with bits of scone.

"And aren't you supposed to be visiting the Falklands or something?" said the Queen brushing herself off.

     "Are we becoming a nuisance your Majesty?" asked Caroline Crumble

"Certainly not," said the Queen. "It's just all this waiting is very tiring. I wish that something would happen." 

"Like what?" asked the President.

"Well..."

Before the Queen could think of something appropriate, something happened.

A door appeared directly above their table.

"Oh!" said the Queen. "How odd!"

The door opened and a skinny woman with red hair leapt down onto the table, landing lightly between the Queen's best teapot and a large cherry trifle. At the same time another figure shot out the doorway. She however went skidding across the table, sending cups, cakes, scones, and puddings flying in all directions.

Caroline Crumble gasped. It was Lizzie!

A huge roar came from inside the doorway and suddenly a swarm of flying monsters burst out, closely pursued by a giant metal robot whose hands were spitting fire.

The Queen at this point was lost for words. She watched, open-mouthed as the woman with the red hair began to run around the edge of the table, demolishing the few remaining cakes and teacups that Lizzie had left standing.

"Close the blooming door!" she screamed.

Lizzie sprang to her feet, wearing a cherry gateau that had broken her fall. She raced across the table, dodging exploding monsters and blaster bolts, and slammed the door shut. The door bulged out, as if something massive were trying break through - then it was gone.

The Prime Minister sat through all of this with two and a half scones wedged in his mouth. The President, whose coffee had gone down the wrong way, was not much better off.  Eventually coffee and scone were coughed up and as one the President and Prime Minister yelled at the top of their voices.

"Agent Steel! Colonel Brown! Get in here now!"

   The door to the Stateroom opened and Special Agent Steel and Colonel Brown ran into the room just in time to see the Queen fend off a flapping monster with a deftly thrown teacake.

"Good shot your Majesty!" cried Lizzie. "Whatever you do, don't let them touch you!"

"What on earth have you done now?" cried her mother.

"Honestly mum it's not my fault!" yelled Lizzie. "Go on blame me anyway. Everything's always my fault!"

She grabbed a big silver tray and with a double thwack she angrily knocked the two remaining monsters away from the President and Prime Minister. They flew across the table and disappeared with a Whump, into the bodies of Colonel Brown and Special Agent Steel.

"Opps!" cried Lizzie.

Both men gasped. Then they started shaking and twitching, as if something was attacking them from the inside. Then their expressions changed. The looks of horror were wiped from their faces and in their place grew looks of pure evil.

Colonel Brown took a walky-talky out of his pocket.

"Sergeant!" he hissed. "Code Blue in the Stateroom!" 

Agent Steel spoke into his jacket collar. "Code violet, with a hint of lavender! The President and Prime Minister have been taken over by aliens! Get in here right away!"

"Steel! What the hell do you mean I've been..."

The President never finished his sentence. Agent Steel had used the sonic wristwatch on him, and he slumped forward unconscious. He did the same to the Prime Minister, the Queen and Caroline Crumble. Soon they were all asleep, with their heads resting in the remains of various cakes and puddings.

Suddenly the French windows exploded and in came Sergeant Pike and his platoon, followed by the Americans - and a football.

"Pike!" yelled Colonel Brown. "Arrest that woman and the robot."

Agent Steel growled at his Men. "You heard the Colonel! Arrest them!" 

The 'Men in Black' fanned out to the left while Sergeant Pike also went left. After a short argument they tossed a coin.

"Wait! Don't fire!" cried Lizzie. "This is the ruler of the Galaxy!"

"Don't listen to her!" shouted Agent Steel. "Lizzie Crumble is a traitor. She's betrayed the Earth! Kill her!"

The army and the 'Men in Black' hesitated. Then, without anyone noticing, the Colonel removed the laser pen from his pocket and fired it at the ceiling. The chandelier came crashing down and soon it was as if a war had started in the Stateroom!

Rex shielded the Empress and Lizzie from the bullets. Then to Lizzie's horror, the giant droid raised his blasters.

"No!" shouted Lizzie, but much to her surprise and relief, when he began firing back, the soldiers he hit only seemed to be stunned and not burnt to a cinder. Then she noticed that Rex had manoeuvred himself so that the French windows were behind him.

"Climb on to his float-plate!" cried Lizzie above the noise.

The Empress followed Lizzie's lead and suddenly there was a whoosh of air and they were flying backwards through the French windows. As they rose into the air the world spun violently around and they found themselves facing forwards.

Lizzie looked back over her shoulder at Buckingham Palace. She could see the soldiers and the 'Men in Black' rushing out of the hole where the French windows had been. It started to rain. Then lightning burst around them. Rex dropped down to rooftop level. He zipped over some roads and they found themselves in Hyde Park, flying over a boating lake. The rain grew heavier and Rex dropped down even lower until they were just a few metres above the surface. Lizzie knew something was wrong.

"Go there!" she said, pointing to a boathouse at the side of the lake. Rex skimmed over the choppy water and skidded to a stop beside the hut. Seconds later the door was open and they were inside.

The hut was dark and dingy. Boats and canoes were piled up all around the walls, tied up with lengths of electric cable. There was a table with two chairs in the centre of the hut and on it drummed the drip, drip, drip of rain pouring in from dozens of holes in the roof. It was damp and cold, but at least no one was shooting at them.

Rex found an empty space in the far corner and dropped onto the floor with a clank.

Empress Zamora stumbled off his float plate and stood shivering next to him. Her eyes were wild. 

"Did you see it?" she asked. "The creature in the corridor. It was looking at me! Only me! Why was it only looking at me?"

For a second Lizzie wondered what the Empress was talking about. Then she remembered the creature with the giant eye.

"Don't worry," she said, trying to reassure her. "It's stuck in the corridor and you've got the ring that makes the door."

"Yes! The ring!"

The Empress pulled the ring off her finger and threw it on the ground.

"Destroy it Rex!"

Rex slowly raised his arm and pointed it at the ring.

   Nothing happened.

   "You useless pile of junk!" cried the Empress, pummelling Rex's chest with her fists. "You've used up all your energy!"

   She picked up the ring and put it back on her finger. 

   "You'll have to get him recharged. And do something about the heat! I'm freezing to death!"    

   "Yes your Majesty!" sighed Lizzie. She looked around and found a small gas camping stove and matches. Soon the stove was lit and the hut began to feel warmer.

   "This is all Chizwick's fault!" said the Empress, warming her hands in front of the fire. I never thought he had it in him to try and kill me."

   "I don't think it was him," began Lizzie. "I..."

   "What? Of course it was Chizwick!" snapped the Empress. "Do you think I don't know my own Vizier?"  

   "What I mean your Majesty is...I don't think he could help it. I think he was taken over by one of those creatures that live in the corridor. Chizwick would never do anything to hurt you. Not if he could help it."

   The Empress looked up from the fire. "You think so?"

   "It's the only explanation," said Lizzie. "You like him really, don't you?"

   For a second the Empress's face seemed to soften. Then it grew hard again and she let out a snort of contempt.

   "Don't be so ridiculous child! He's always such a do-gooder. Telling me to brush my teeth at night. Stopping me from having moons blown up! I'm glad to be rid of him."

   "You don't really mean that," said Lizzie.

   "Of course I do!" bellowed the Empress. "He's been nothing but a thorn in my side all these years. I hope he's dead! And if he isn't yet I'll make sure when I..."

   She stopped and looked at Lizzie. "What's wrong now?" she asked. "Why have your eyes started watering?"

   "It's nothing." said Lizzie. Wiping away the tears with the back of her hand. "It's just that you saying those things about Chizwick...it reminded me of dad. And he's probably..."

   A shudder went through her. Instinctively she clutched at the cassette in her shoulder bag, holding it to her chest for comfort.

   "Why do you value that thing?" asked the Empress, looking at the bag with interest.

   "Because it's all I have." answered Lizzie numbly. "Dad and Billy are dead, and mum will be as well! And it's all my fault!"

   The Empress opened her mouth - but stopped herself. She had been about to tell Lizzie that their lives were insignificant, that they were nothing but insects - when suddenly she realised that to Lizzie they were anything but that. And then a thought struck her. She didn't want Lizzie to feel bad. She didn't know what to do. She could offer Lizzie the world. She could promise her anything, but she knew it wouldn't make her feel any better. Finally, because she couldn't think of anything else, she reached out her hand and patted her shoulder. Suddenly Lizzie was hugging her. It felt awkward. But she wouldn't let go - and she was crying, great big, shaking sobs that only stopped when she finally fell asleep.